Just Friends
by IWillNeverLetYouDown
Summary: A/U: Alex and Piper were high school best friends until Alex professed her love for Piper on the night of graduation. Fast forward 10 years, and Alex happens to stumble upon Piper. Once in the friend zone, always in the friend zone? *Loosely based on the movie Just Friends*
1. That Lovin Feelin'

Chapter One: That Lovin' Feelin'

_Piper's POV_

Music thumps in the background as I watch dozens of my supposed high school friends grind up on each other in an attempt to look sexy. Everyone on the dance floor is plastered from a combination of liquor, beer and, most likely, weed. But, tonight, I don't let the sweaty, sticky people dancing bother me. If they want to dance like that, so be it. We did just graduate high school after all.

However, I still prefer to stand on the sidelines with a red cup in my hand instead of dancing all up on some drunk guy with a goal of conquering me in the back of his mind. As I watch my friend from the tennis team dance all over her boyfriend, someone bumps into me, causing my beer to slosh out of the sides of my cup.

When I turn to yell at the drunk idiot who made me spill beer on my Toms, I am taken aback by the shit-eating grin of my best friend for the last four years of high school. With long black locks tipped with blue and secretary glasses perched on her nose, I take in the sight of my gorgeous friend. I've always wondered why she never had a boyfriend with the looks she has.

"Alex," I murmur under my breath, trying to suppress the grin that is now forcing its way onto my face. "You had to make me spill my beer, didn't you?"

In response, Alex saddles up next to me closer, grabbing the cup from my hand and proceeding to walk away. I almost yell after her—obviously I want my beer back—but I let her do whatever it is she is out to do. I've learned her ways by now.

My mind is wandering while Alex is gone. I'm presuming she is going to return to where I am soon, so I don't dare move a step. I let the music drum into my soul, sending waves of bass up my spine and forcing my body to react by swaying. This song is one of my favorite oldies.

_You never close your eyes anymore when I kiss your lips._

_And there's no tenderness like before in your fingertips._

_You're trying hard not to show it,_

_But baby, baby I know._

_You lost that lovin' feelin'_

_Whoa, that lovin' feelin'_

_You lost that lovin' feelin'_

_Now it's gone, gone, gone, whoa._

I wonder silently who chose to play that song. It really isn't an anthem from our time in high school—rather it is a song people only sing after watching "Top Gun." But I'm glad that it's playing right now, even though a lot of people on the dance floor are pissed since they can't really grind on another to it. The fact that my peers think the only dancing you can do is grind makes me quite sad. There is so much more to dancing than rubbing your ass on someone.

My thoughts are suddenly interrupted by Alex, who has returned with a fresh beer in her hands. And this beer is in a can. I smile at the fact that she grabbed something in a can since a can makes it harder to spill beer on yourself.

"I love this song. It reminds me of 'Top Gun.' What a fucking classic movie. Let's watch it this summer," Alex tells me as she hands me the beer can with a glint in her eye.

I sigh, thinking about the implications of this summer. It's the last summer before we both head off to college. Alex, despite her insistence that she can't afford it, is going to attend the community college in the area while I head off to Smith per my parent's request.

"What are you thinking about, Pipes? You know I can always tell when you're thinking about something important. That, and you haven't answered me in the last minute," Alex says as she nudges my right shoulder with her left shoulder. For some reason, I feel a tingling sensation in my shoulder after hers touches mine. I shake it off, blaming the feeling on the alcohol coursing through my veins.

"I know I am supposed to be overjoyed at graduating high school. And I am supposed to be super excited for college, too, but all I can think about is not seeing you every day anymore. You're my best friend," I say, my voice barely audible above the bumping music.

The look on Alex's face when I say that makes my heart sink into my chest. I watch as the corner of her eyes fill up with tears. This is the first time I have ever seen her cry. But she doesn't make a big deal of it. Instead, she lets the tears silently run down her face as she pulls me into a bone crushing hug, with her arms wrapped around the top of my body while my arms wrap around her stomach. I bury my head into her shoulder as she nuzzles her head into my neck. I realize when I slowly pull away how intimate that hug actually was.

"Hey, I have a surprise for you," Alex whispers in my ear after the hug.

She knows how I love surprises—her being at this party is one of the best surprise all year. Every time I attend, in her words, "a yuppie party in some rich kid's parent's basement," she gives me shit for going. No matter how hard she tries to be a bad ass around everyone else, though, to me, Alex is a softie. And I know she would do anything for me or for her mom. We're family to her. That's why she's here tonight.

"You didn't have to do anything for me," I try to convincingly protest, although I know Alex can see right through me. She knows I am thrilled at the prospect of a surprise or a gift. I wish I would have gotten her something for tonight. I have something planned to give her later. Regret runs through my body.

"Don't be upset that you didn't get me anything, either. You becoming friends with me my freshman year is a gift enough. I'm not sure what I would've done in high school without you, kid. I mean it. This is just my way to repay you," Alex mumbles.

I've never heard her talk like this before. She isn't putting on a show like she normally does. She's acting like the real Alex Vause. The girl underneath the skin. The girl that is my best friend.

Alex takes me by my wrist and starts to weave through the throngs of people on the overcrowded dance floor. I let her lead me to wherever it is she is heading without a single word. As we make our through the house, I bump into a few friends from old classes and clubs. I say my hellos quickly because Alex never once stops the entire time she pulls me along.

"Where are we going?" I ask once we are outside. In retrospect, asking that question was idiotic since we are outside. Obviously we aren't going anywhere but here. There's nowhere else to go unless we are leaving the party.

"You're so dumb sometimes, Pipes," Alex tells me. I hint a double meaning behind the phrase but I don't press her any further.

Alex motions for me to follow her a little bit more. My eyes have adjusted slowly to the darkness outside, and, once they adjust fully, I understand where Alex is taking me. Between two small trees is a hammock. I smile because Alex remembered how much I love these things. Whenever I see one, I always jump on it and swing ferociously back and forth.

I run ahead and hop on first before Alex can even say a word to me. I hear her raspy laugh behind me. I swear I can feel the shake of her head as way. I lay down on it as I wait for my best friend to climb on next. Finally, I feel the weight of the hammock shift as Alex wrestles her way onto the rickety ropes. She lays down right next to me, balancing out the hammock.

Her body is pressed up against mine, and I am comforted in the fact that we can silently lay next to each other on a hammock without feeling uncomfortable or awkward. For a couple of minutes, we don't say a word or move an inch. We just close our eyes and take in the night air. It's a wonderful feeling, knowing your best friend is right next to you no matter what.

"So about this surprise…" I trail off, my voice a whisper in the night.

Alex turns her head so that she can look me in the eyes. I notice something underneath her usual glint and grin, and I try to think of exactly what it is she is trying to convey in the look she's giving me. I stare back anyway, waiting for her response.

"Look up," Alex instructs swiftly. She takes my hand in hers, positioning my hand so that only my pointer finger is straight. Her hand is soft and warm as she clasps onto the back of my hand, and I swear I can feel the blood pumping through her veins, her heart thumping wildly.

"You see that star? It's next to the Big Dipper. It's not very big," she says, moving my hand with hers so that my pointer finger is directly aiming at the star she is talking about.

I nod my head and whisper out a quiet 'yes' before Alex releases her grip and returns her hand back to crossing over her chest. She pauses for a second, not wanting to break the beautiful bubble we are in. My best friend is something else.

"That's our star," she explains. And my heart soars. "It's our friendship star."

When she says the word friendship, I detect a hint of sadness behind her voice, but I attribute it to the fact that we only have three more months together before we enter a world in which we never will exit. Adulthood—with all its responsibilities and opportunities and privileges. It means that we will not be able to feign innocence. We will not be able to see each other all the time.

"You blew my grad gift for you out of the water," I say shyly, feeling somewhat embarrassed at the mediocre gift I made for her. I planned on giving it to her before we went to school in August, but I may give it to her sooner now. It's a scrapbook. I know it is a cliché, but I think Alex will appreciate it. She loves that sentimental stuff, even if she won't admit it out loud.

"Don't even say that," Alex says.

We still haven't moved an inch, and I feel the heat from her body. Her arms are now down by her sides, as are mine, and I gasp a little as I feel her take her hand and intertwine it with one of mine. She doesn't say anything or squeeze my hand or do anything else. She just continues to breathe deeply and to look up at our star.

"I love you," Alex proclaims. When I hear the words come out of her mouth, I think of all the other times she's said those words to me. Never before have the sounded or felt the way they do now. It's…different.

"I love you, too," I pause. "You're like the sister I never had. You're my best friend."

I feel Alex clench and then retract her hand from mine. And I silently wonder what I said wrong. Alex _is_ like my sister. And she definitely is my best friend. I can't imagine high school without her. She changed me.

"That's all I am to you? A friend?" The way Alex says it makes it sound like she is defeated. Like I said the wrong thing and she wants me to take it back. Then it all clicks. It's like a montage appears in my head, flashing back to all the times we've spent together:

_"How come you've never had a boyfriend?" I ask Alex. "Every boy thinks you're incredibly hot and irresistible. I wish boys thought that about me." _

_ Alex only shrugs. _

_ "I guess I don't care too much about boys."_

_ …_

_ I'm sitting on Alex's bed in her tiny room with navy blue walls. Alex is sitting opposite of me, a pencil in her mouth and headphones over her ears. I'm reading a book for fun while she does homework. As I read, it feels as if someone is staring at me. The look burns. When I look up, I notice Alex avert her gaze quickly, a blush forming on her cheeks. _

_ I go back to reading, thinking nothing of it._

_ …_

_ "Hey, I have something to tell you," I say as my heart beats wildly in my chest. _

_ "Yeah, what is it, Pipes?" Alex scoots closer to me. _

_ "I had sex with David last night. And it was amazing." _

_ "That's fantastic," Alex drawls out, a look of anger running across her face. "Hope you don't get pregnant." _

_ "That's all you have to say? Why can't you ever be happy for me and David?" I exclaim, wondering why she always acts this way when I bring up David. _

_ "Because he doesn't deserve you, and he never will." _

"You love me…" I mumble.

"Yeah, I do."

And with that, I feel the weight of the hammock become uneven as Alex stumbles off it, stuffing her hands in her pocket and fast walking back to the house. I watch as she chugs the rest of her beer, discards it and slips through the sliding door.

That's the last time I see her for ten years.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Loosely based off the movie "Just Friends." Let me know what ya think. **


	2. Partition

Chapter Two: Partition

_Alex's POV_

**10 years later…**

Christmas music drifts in and out of my ears, quietly reminding me that I have yet to buy gifts for my mom and for my clients. But I push the thoughts of the holiday out of my mind, and, instead, I focus my mind on the blonde sitting next to me.

She's wearing a cute number. I can tell she tried to have a Christmas themed outfit while still wearing something sexy and revealing. I notice the silkiness of the top, the way it plunges on the neckline, showing a bit of cleavage. It's not too much and it's sure as hell not too little.

I hear her voice talking, and I realize that I've been staring instead of listening to the blonde. Immediately, I return my gaze back to her eyes while simultaneously picking up my drinking and bringing it to my lips, taking a pull of my beer. The blonde watches intently—even though she is still talking away—and, at that moment, I know I have her trapped in my web. The way she licks her lips, gazes at my body longingly, it's a tall-tell sign.

"Let's head back to my place," I interrupt without feeling one bit guilty.

She nods her head, and I slam a $50 on the bar.

"This way."

* * *

><p>"Sit your ass down, Vause. You need to watch this," my boss tells me. Her name's Red, and the name fits her attitude perfectly.<p>

Obeying her command is the only smart thing to do, so I plop down on the end of the couch that adorns her spacious office. The couch is comfy as fuck, and I decide to slide down farther into it, preparing myself to sit and watch something I know I do not want to watch. Whatever it is smells like trouble already. Red picks me to do her dirty work.

Red grabs the remote for her 20 inch flat screen TV that is mounted on her wall opposite of her huge desk. She clicks a button, which turns the TV on, before pressing play for the video already cued up. When I see the face on the screen, I know I'm going to punch myself.

On the screen is one of the most successful Christian rock singers in the country. Christian music has recently become a huge hit in America, and this singer is the reason why. She is a pompous asshole who only preaches about the Gospel and sin and hell and God and…yeah. But, damn, she has a huge following. People love her. And it sure isn't for her teeth or looks. It's a mystery, actually.

I take a deep breath and force myself not to say anything to Red right now, at least not until the video is over and I know exactly what job I am doing. So, I continue watching the damn TV screen. It's a commercial.

"My name is Tiffany Doggett," the voice from the TV says.

The camera zooms in on Tiffany. She's at a homeless shelter, and it's made to look like she is helping by handing out food to the people at the shelter. I know Tiffany has never worked a soup kitchen in her life. This is all just a stunt to make her look like the perfect little Christian. She then goes on some spiel about helping the homeless and giving money for charity, which, I admit, is a good cause. I just can't see Tiffany as the face for that.

For a second, I'm wondering why exactly I am watching this commercial of Tiffany, despite her being our client. That is until the end of the commercial.

"As a Christmas gift to everyone here at St. Patrick's Homeless Shelter, I am giving each person a signed copy of my new CD that is set to release in two weeks," Tiffany explains with a toothless smile plastered on her face. Because a homeless person definitely wants a copy of her CD. They probably don't own anything to even play the damn thing.

I know what Red is having me do. I'm on fucking Tiffany detail until the new release. I can already guess what she is going to make me do after this dumb commercial is over. It probably has something to do with listening to her sing some songs and then flying her out to our headquarters in California. Fuck me.

"I need you to make sure her album release goes off without a hitch. Tiff is already in the studio in our recording building down the street. Go make nice," Red drawls. "And after, you will take her to Cali. Clear?"

I nod. Red can tell I'm pissed.

"If you fuck this up Vause, your ass is in the trash. Now shoo."

After leaving Red's office, I make my way down the street to the recording studio to meet Tiffany. She knows who I am and I know who she is. For some reason, she tolerates me even though I am "going to rot in hell for my homosexual ways."

Pushing open the swinging glass door to the studio, I take one glance at the pained faces of the technicians working the sound and know I am in for a real treat. The noise coming out of the speakers makes me want to bang my head against a wall. Tiffany notices me and waves at me while she continues singing into the microphone.

Three painfully long songs later and Tiffany exits the recording room. I tell her to take a seat on one of the couches so we can talk business. Namely, that she needs to pack and hop on a plane in less than two hours.

"God has truly blessed me today, Vause! I am humbled. A chance to drop another album is God's way of showing me the way to righteousness! Praise him," Tiffany preaches.

"So blessed," I mumble but Tiffany doesn't hear it.

"And he has given me a chance to help fix you!"

And here it goes.

"Ok, Tiffany, we can talk all about fixing me on our private flight to California in two hours. We wanna get you all set up for the release, ok?"

After talking for a little bit longer, I send Tiffany off in one of the corporate limos and tell the driver to meet us at the airport so that we can get this show on the road. Or, well, the air, I guess, since we're flying.

Two hours later, and we are finally—blessedly, as Tiffany put it—in the air and on our way to California. It's a long flight since we are leaving from Massachusetts, and I am all ready to take a nice, long nap the whole trip. Tiffany, however, has a different idea for the flight. She pulls out her guitar and starts to fucking sing again and again and again.

Finally, she goes to make food in the microwave and I take that as my chance to close my eyes and sleep. I am well on my way to a peaceful sleep when I smell something funny. It actually smells like something is burning. What the—

"FIRE!" I hear Tiffany scream at the top of her lungs.

And that's how we end up having an emergency landing in my old hometown.

It must be a nightmare, I think to myself as I pick up my phone and punch in a familiar number—one that is etched into my memory. We just had to land in Ohio. No, we _had_ to land in Hillon, OH. The smallest fucking city in the whole state. Perfect. Just perfect.

The other end of the call picks up. I clear my throat.

"Ma? Hey, it's Alex. I'm actually in town," I say. My mom lets out a little squeal and starts to talk before I stop her.

"Can I stay at home? With a guest?"

My mom doesn't hesitate with an affirmation.

_Welcome home, Alex_.

* * *

><p>Snow lines the streets and covers the houses. It's even more of a breathtaking sight when the lights from the street illuminate the sparkles in the flakes of snow. I take it all in as the taxi takes Tiffany and me back to my old stomping ground. The taxi pulls up slowly in front of my small but quaint home. My mom never had that much money—she has to work three jobs still—but she always told me that we would live in houses, not apartments, because she wanted me to feel like I have a place to myself.<p>

Looking up at the house now, I appreciate my mom's determination. Since it's almost Christmas, my mom has taken it upon herself to start putting up decorations on the outside and the inside of the house. The one thing she has to do still is put up the lights outside like she always does. Maybe I'll help her while I'm here. Which is hopefully only for a day.

My mom isn't home when we get in. She's off working one of her jobs, so I tell Tiffany to set her stuff down in the spare room we have. Then I mention heading to the local bar. I know she disapproves of drinking and of bars, which is exactly why I chose to go there.

"I think I will stay here. Bars are full of sin."

Leaving Tiffany behind with some food and magazines, I call a taxi and patiently wait for it to arrive and take me to my blessed haven. I could use a strong drink at the moment. It's been a long day, and it's about to be an even longer two weeks. Alcohol is going to be _my _savior for these two weeks while Tiffany's savior is God. To each their own.

Being back in my hometown causes a flood of memories to race into my mind. The quiet time in the cab doesn't help ward off these thoughts. Instead, it allows for these thoughts that I have been suppressing for the last ten years to spring back up.

My thoughts travel to my time in high school. Before high school, I moved around a lot, but my mom promised me that I would stay at a high school for all four years, and she kept her promise when we moved to Hillon. And I'm glad she did because I found my best friend.

Piper.

Her name alone causes me to flinch. I knew in middle school that I liked girls, but I never told anyone except my mom. Piper never knew that I had a crush on her. That I loved her more than a friend. That is until the night of graduation when I spilled the beans and then never talked to her again. She didn't love me back, which was stupid of me to think she would, and I never forgave myself for putting my heart out there.

Some part of me wishes Piper lived in Hillon now, but another part of me knows she is too good to live here her whole life and knows she is probably not in town. My mind is telling me to hope she is not in Hillon but my heart, well, the heart wants what it wants. Because everything I've done since I left Piper on a hammock in a backyard—a profession of love dangling in the air—has been to prove myself to Piper. Not that I've talked to her after that night.

Shaking away those unwanted thoughts, I exit the cab and walk into the dingy bar. The lighting is dim and casts an ugly shade of yellow on everyone in the bar. Music is coming out of an old jukebox, and people are lined up along the bar in flannels and jeans, beers in their hands and smiles on their lips.

The song playing is one of my client's newer hits.

_Take all of me_

_I just wanna be the girl you like, girl you like_

_The kind of girl you like, girl you like_

_Take all of me_

_I just wanna be the girl you like, girl you like_

_The kind of girl you like_

_Is right here with me_

I watch as a few heads turn to see who the newcomer is. A few jaws drop when they notice who I am and how I look—which is a hell of a lot different than I did in high school. I grew into my body and my curves become fuller and more feminine. I wear more form-fitting, sexier clothes and have let my hair grow longer. I look hot, and I know it.

Sauntering over to the bar, I squeeze in between two people to order a beer. The bartender's back is facing me, but I like what I am seeing. Blonde hair, a runner's body. Not to mention a cute ass. I'm about to use an infamous Alex Vause pick-up line until the bartender turns around. Then it's my turn for my jaw to drop.

"Alex..." a timid voice says quietly.

Piper walks over to me as if she has seen a ghost, her hand is outstretched so that she can touch me to see if I am real.

I don't allow her to get any closer before I turn on my heel and start walking the other way. I guess I didn't want to see Piper. Not like this anyway. My heart is hammering in my chest as I keep my cool and walk towards the exit. This is not what I expected when I decided to go out for a drink. No, this never crossed my mind at all.

"Alex! Wait!" Piper yells.

I hear footsteps getting closer to me before I feel a hand enclosing around my wrist, stopping me in my tracks and turning me around. And now Piper and I are face-to-face. And, God, does she look even more beautiful than she did ten years ago. I almost melt in the spot.

"You do not get the right to walk away from me again," Piper states boldly.

I wonder where this courageous Piper came from until I realize that I don't know Piper anymore. She could be a whole new person now. It's been ten fucking years.

"Fuck. You—you're here. You work at the bar," I comment dumbly.

No shit she does, Sherlock, I mentally scold myself. I am a rambling idiot right now.

"Yeah, that's what I get for majoring in English and theater. My parents aren't too pleased. You know how they are," Piper says. "Why are you here?"

I take a moment to collect my thoughts before I answer.

"Business. I work for Red's Records, and I am assigned currently to Tiffany Doggett and we're doing some promo stunts," I say, lying through my teeth. "But I work with more famous people all of the time. Jay-Z, Beyoncé, Taylor Swift…"

I start ticking off the people on my mental list of clients. I'm trying to impress the fuck out of Piper because that's the asshole I am these days.

"Wow, that's awesome, Al."

The nickname slips off her tongue and I can tell she's embarrassed by the way her cheeks light up like a fire. I want to reach out and touch her face or pull her in for a hug, but it's awkward between us now. I fucked things up. And I can't take it back.

"Yeah, I'm a pretty big deal at the company."

Piper stares. I stare.

Finally, Piper pulls her gaze away.

"How long are you here for?" Piper asks.

And here comes another lie. Now that I've seen Piper I can't help but want more time with her. Fuck Tiffany. Fuck the album release. I want Piper. Damn, I've always wanted her and now she's in front of me. I'm not letting her go now that I've finally seen her again—even if it was my fault I haven't seen her in years.

"You know what? I'm not sure," I say.

Piper subconsciously takes a step closer to me, the distance between us lessening. I think my wildest dreams are about to come true—that she is going to tell me she loves me, that she always has. That she'll kiss me. But she doesn't, and I know better than to wish that. Piper likes boys. She doesn't like me. Probably not even as a friend anymore after what I did.

She pushes back a string of her blonde hairs, fidgeting with the end of it once it's safely tucked behind her ear. It's a nervous habit that she did even in high school. I always found it endearing, but now, it makes _me_ nervous. Plus, the smell of Piper's perfume hits me all of a sudden, making me about to say something really fucking dumb. Luckily, Piper speaks up before the words leave my mouth.

"Let's get lunch. Tomorrow."

I want to say yes—I really, truly do. But the first thing I've learned from Friend Zone 101 in high school is that lunch dates are the first step to reentering the dreaded circle of friendship. And I don't know if I can subject myself to being only friends with Piper again.

_Say no, Alex. Stick it to her_, I think to myself. But then I realize that Piper can't control her feelings, and it's not fair of me to hate her for not liking me. She never did anything wrong.

So I cave. Like I always do when it comes to Piper.

"Sure, let's do lunch."

Next stop on the Alex Vause Shit Show Train: Friend Zone.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I'm trying to stick a little bit to the movie (if you've seen it), which is why I have them going to lunch tomorrow. Most of the beginning of this chapter was background information on Alex, but I thought it was important. Reviews are always nice :)**


	3. Wake Me Up

Chapter Three: Wake Me Up

_Alex's POV_

_Feeling my way through the darkness_

_Guided by a beating heart_

_I can't tell where the journey will end_

_But I know where to start_

_They tell me I'm too young to understand_

_Say I'm caught up in a dream_

_Well, life will pass me by if I don't open up my eyes_

_But that's fine by me_

_So, wake me up when it's all over_

_When I'm wiser and I'm older_

_All this time I was finding myself_

_And I didn't know I was lost_

* * *

><p>"Remember the story I told you about a pathetic high school graduate who told her best friend she loved her?" I ask my now best friend on the other line.<p>

I'm sitting on my twin-sized bed that I used back in high school. It still has the same black sheets and quilted comforter that it had ten years ago. The bed is really springy, and it moans every time I make one slight movement. There are many things I miss about high school, but this is not one of them. I despised this bed but never said anything because I remember how happy my mom was when she presented it to me as a Christmas gift. Before then, I had been sleeping on an air mattress.

The person on the other line goes silent for a moment before her voice perks up in interest. I can already tell I made the right decision to call Nicky. I met my bushy-haired friend the second week of classes my freshman year at the local community college about a forty-five minutes away from my house in Hillon.

"Yeah, I remember that. If I'm not mistaken, I think that pathetic high school graduate was you," Nicky says, and I can feel her smirk through the phone. "I'm going to go on a hunch and say that this story is about to become real fucking interesting."

I shake my head because she's right. How can I tell her that I'm in over my head—that I'm about to reenter the friend zone and suffer like I did in high school? How can I tell Nicky that I still feel _something_ for this girl that I haven't spoken to or seen in ten fucking years?

"Fuck you," I state with a laugh to my voice before becoming a little more serious.

"No thanks, Vause. We fucked once, and it was the weirdest shit ever," Nicky chuckles.

A knock on my door interrupts the conversation, and I tell Nicky to hold on for a second. All I hear before putting the phone down is Nicky yelling something about vaginas. Nicky sure is something else, but that's why I love her. We're pretty similar creatures.

The door swings open before I have a chance to say come in. I'm expecting the person to be my mother, but I am surely mistaken. It's fucking Tiffany. And she has that look on her face that means she wants to murder someone. Here we go.

"Why in God's name are we not flying back to California right now?" Tiffany's voices rings out with a tang of annoyance in it.

Thinking back to what I said to Piper at the bar last night, I know I can spin this emergency landing in my hometown as a positive for Tiffany. I'm going to have to convince her that this is all for the best—staying here in my hometown—so that she won't blab on me to Red. Lord knows I don't need Red up my asshole about this.

"Red wants us to do some promo stints at the churches around the area while we are here. She told me that this emergency landing is God's plan," I lie, standing up at the same time and walking over to where Tiffany is.

"Now, I'm on the phone with another client, so if I could have some peace and quiet," I trial off as I simultaneously push Tiffany out of the room and shut the door. Finally, she's gone.

I pick up my phone and am glad that Nicky didn't hang up on me yet. Taking a deep breath, I take the phone and put it up to my ear.

"Sorry about that, Nicky. I'm on fucking Tiffany Doggett duty for the next two weeks," I tell her. Nicky hates that girl with all her being, but I don't let her respond to what I just said because I have more pressing matters at hand. Namely, what the fuck am I going to say to my ex-best friend in less than two hours when we have lunch together?

"So the stupid high school girl who professed her love to her best friend is now having lunch with said best friend ten years later in less than two hours," I spill out. "What should this girl say and how should she act?"

I hate being reduced to this self-conscious little girl again. That's how I was in high school whenever I was around Piper. I always was super aware of what I said and what I wore and what I did around her. That's before I grew a pair in college and adulthood and decided to not give any fucks about anything. I'm more myself now than I ever have been previously.

"Oh, this about to be real fun," Nicky comments. "Be your fucking self, Vause. Don't let that girl change who you are. You owe it to her and yourself to be you. If she doesn't like the person that you are now, well, fuck her."

"I wish I could fuck her," I mumble, earning a laugh from Nicky. "But I want to impress her. I want her to like me."

"No, Vause, you want her to love you, and I'm not sure if that will ever happen."

* * *

><p>Sweat covers the palms of my hand as I reach out and grab the door handle to enter the diner Piper and I frequented every weekend back in high school. It's a quaint little diner, and I still can recognize about half of the staff to this day. People in my town don't really move on after they graduate. I'm the rare exception. And I thought Piper would be, too, until I obviously discovered last night that she ended up back in Hillon.<p>

Piper isn't here yet, which is how I like it. I want to have the one up in today's lunch date. Although, I don't think date is the right word to use. Anyway, I ask for a booth and am directed by some pimply, greasy-haired teenage boy to a booth in the back corner. He asks if I would like to start off with a drink while I wait. I simply ask for a water, and the boy walks away with a nod.

It's hot in the diner—or maybe it's a combination of heat from the vents and nervousness at seeing Piper, like really seeing her, for the first time in years. At this point, I'd say the nerves area at an all-time high, especially when I hear the ding of the bell above the diner door sound, signaling that someone has entered the restaurant. And that someone is my absolutely beautiful high school best friend.

She's wearing a pair of dark jeans with a blue long sleeved top. Over top of the long sleeved shirt is a cream scarf and a tan jacket with numerous pockets. To complete her gorgeous outfit, she has on dark brown combat boots. I watch as she looks around the diner, trying to spot where I am. Her medium-length blonde hair is curled loosely, and it covers her face when she whips her head around trying to find me.

Nervously, I raise my hand, giving away my location. Piper gives me a timid smile as she walks over to the booth. I wish I could know what was running through her mind right now. I would give anything for her thoughts not to be about that one fateful night after graduation. I've spent my whole life regretting that night. I broke my own heart and lost my best friend in the process. Granted, I'm the one who refused to talk to her after that day because of how embarrassed I was.

Piper is a mere ten feet away from me now, and I am about to run away again. I'm so nervous that I can't even handle anything other than breathing. It's so frustrating that she can reduce me to this blubbering, nervous mess. Whenever I am around any other girl, I am confident and sure of myself. I never falter.

But I know I am going to falter today.

"Hey," Piper says as she slides into the booth.

"Hey yourself," I manage to croak out, my voice taking on an even lower octave than it normally is. It's like I couldn't find my voice. Piper sucked it out of me the moment she walked in looking like a goddess.

"God, this place hasn't changed a bit," I say after a momentary silence between the two of us. It's like we don't know how to act in front of the other anymore. I bet Piper feels awkward because she knows about me now.

"I know," Piper says happily.

I never understood why Piper loved it here so much. It was her idea that we went here to eat today instead of some place nicer—some place more fit for adults. I'm fiddling with the napkin that holds my silverware together in an attempt to channel my nerves somewhere else but my stomach. It's not working.

And all the while, Piper is sitting there on the edge of her side of the booth with a huge grin plastered on her face. While Piper seems eager to be here, I, on the other hand, am going to try to play it cool. I want to show her what she missed out on. Fuck the advice Nicky gave me earlier. Piper didn't romantically love the Alex back in high school so why would she now?

"Are you sure you don't want to go someplace else?" I ask with an edge behind my voice. I don't notice Piper's smile falter when I say that.

"No, we can't leave. We have history here," Piper states simply as if that answers everything. History means nothing to me anymore. The only thing that matters now is my career and the countless, nameless girls I not-so-shamelessly bring back to my flat.

"History," I mumble under my breath as the waitress who always took our orders in high school comes over to the table with a pad of paper and a pen in her hand.

I used to order some stack of pancakes with chocolate all over them. That was when I ate like shit and weighed 30 more pounds than I do now. I've slimed down a lot since high school, and I finally feel really confident in my body.

"Oh my goodness, I remember you two," the familiar waitress says in a cooed voice. "Oh, you're not a chubby bunny anymore."

Cue the cheek grabbing. This lady is a pain in my ass and is embarrassing me in front of Piper. I pick up my metal fork and start poking the air right by the waitress's hand that is pinching my cheek.

"You're in my personal space," I say in a high voice, clearly annoyed at the whole situation happening right now. Piper doesn't seem to notice my annoyance, and she keeps smiling that dazzling smile of hers. Damn that smile.

Instead of taking our orders, the waitress says, "I'll be right back. I've got a little surprise for you."

Once the waitress leaves, I look over at Piper who is suppressing a laugh. For a moment, I think she is going to burst from holding in the laughter until she pretends to pinch her cheeks, mimicking what the old lady did to me.

"Ha ha! Chubby bunny," Piper squeals. All I do is shake my head, trying to keep my cool in this whole situation.

"How's the coast?" Piper asks me, referring to my job at Red's Records. I tried to brag a little bit about myself last night, but I don't think Piper really cared all that much due to her initial shock of seeing me for the first time in a decade.

"Super," I say, making guns with my fingers and flicking them towards her like a total douchebag. I guess that's what I'm going with today: douchebag status. Piper's smile slowly lessens and her head drops as if she wants to yell at me for becoming a complete asshole. What happens next doesn't make me look any better, either.

"Here we go," the waitress says as she rounds the corner with two plates in her hand. "One grilled cheese with ranch on the side. And one sugar mountain supreme for the chubby bunny."

That did it. I am already embarrassed at how the waitress brought up my "bigger" years back in high school, but now she is making bunny noises and handing me a plate full of calories and sugar in front of Piper? I can't do it.

"Excuse me, this isn't going to work for me," I state plainly.

"But this is what you always order."

"Ten years ago when I was a whale," I aggressively say. This lady sure is rubbing me the wrong way. Piper had been surprisingly silent during the whole exchange until now.

"The pancakes are fine. She's just kidding," Piper tells me through gritted teeth, giving me a look that could kill. I suddenly retreat to the back of my seat and put my hands over my chest, as if I am not ok with this conversation or the way this lunch is playing out.

"What…" I say quietly as the waitress walks away with a growl on her face.

"Be more rude?" Piper asks me. I want to apologize for my behavior because that's really not who I am, but it's too late for that now. I've already chosen a role to play and I can't back out now. I'm fated to be the asshole, which doesn't surprise me after how I left our friendship ten years ago.

"She's rude, she's rude! I haven't had sweets in ten years, ok. You know what this would do to my stomach?" At this point, it's a pissing contest between the two of us. I didn't not expect this to happen today. I was going to try to be the kiss-ass, the gentle, kind Alex. But no.

"Relax little girl," Piper exclaims, reaching over to grab my plate. "I'll have the pancakes and you can have my sandwich, ok?"

"I'll just enjoy this glass of water," I say, bringing the glass to my mouth and taking a sip. "Mmmm, I'm stuffed."

Once I do that, I know I'm in the shithole. Piper stands up, throws some money on the table and starts to walk out of the diner. I fucked up real bad today, and I can't say I didn't deserve it because I really did. Standing up, I grab my jacket and trail after the blonde who is now standing outside on the curb.

_Ok, Alex, try to act like a compassionate human being for once, _I dictate to myself. _You don't have to put on a front for her. Stop acting like a jerk_.

The cold air bites me when I step outside, and I notice that Piper is shivering, her tan jacket not doing much to keep her warm. I tell myself that I am going to offer her my coat as a way to make peace, but I know it's because I still like her and I feel protective over her. Offering her my coat is my way of chivalry.

"Pipes, here." I take my jacket and wrap it around her shoulders. At first, I think she is going to refuse my offer and throw my jacket on the thin lining of snow on the sidewalk, but she doesn't. Instead, she threads her arms through the sleeves and hugs herself. Oh, how I wish I could wrap my arms around her to keep her warm.

For a second, I wonder why Piper is standing there and not going to her car before I realize that she doesn't have a car. She must have gotten dropped off here. And now because of how big of a dick I was, she is waiting for the time she told her ride to arrive. I bet she didn't plan on being done with lunch after fifteen minutes.

"Let me take you back to where you live," I offer in a gentle voice. No more attitude.

"No thank you." Piper is dedicated to shutting me out, and I earned that from her. She has starting shaking more, obviously extremely cold in this weather. Instead of looking at me, she is staring ahead. I can tell it is taking all of her will power not to break down and cry. In her mind. I didn't turn out to be the person she thought I would be. I can't even imagine what she's thought of me these last ten years.

"Piper, come on," I grab her arm. Amiss her protests and struggles, I manage to pull her along to where my rental car is parked. It's a fancy red car of some sort. I had the rental company give me the showiest car in their lot so that I could impress Piper. Finally, I have Piper sitting in the passenger seat of my car, and I start to drive before I realize I have no idea where I am taking her. Piper, for once, is remarkably quiet.

"Where am I taking you?" I ask, and I watch as Piper's cheek grow a little bit redder.

"To my parent's house," she quickly says to me. I never thought that Piper would still live at home, but I guess it doesn't come as a surprise to me now because of her current job. She must be so embarrassed because the roles are reversed from what they were in high school.

"Cool," I reply back meekly.

Without realizing it, I move my right hand over to Piper's left leg, keeping my left hand on the wheel. It's something I always do when I take home my conquests for the night. But, now, I just made things even weirder between us. Piper, being the polite woman she is, doesn't say anything or make an attempt to move my hand. She actually doesn't move a muscle at all.

After a ten minute drive, I pull into Piper's parent's driveway, and, boy, does this bring back memories of high school. I close my eyes once the car is in park, pushing my glasses to the top of my head and releasing my hand from my friend's thigh. Peeking through my eyelids, I watch as Piper's mouth turns into a frown at the release of my hand, but I attribute that to coldness because it's not like she likes me or anything. She probably hates me right now and for good reason. I'd hate me right now, too.

Instead of saying anything, I open the door and sprint around to the other side of my rental car. I almost slip on my way there, having to hold onto the trunk of the car to steady myself real quick before reaching my destination.

I open the door to let Piper out into the frigid air and decide to walk her up to her house like a gentleman—or gentlewoman—would do. She starts off in front of me as I trail her from the back. I want to say something, but I don't know what.

"Well, it was great seeing you again," Pipers says in a flat, monotone voice that tells me she means anything but.

"You too," I say as I stomp behind her. I'm freezing because I'm only in thermal shirt now, but I don't mind because it means that Piper is warm. "Glad I ran into you last night."

Lies, lies, lies.

"Yeah, it was a surprise," Piper says, a twist of irony accompanying her words. I am only a foot or two behind Piper right now, but I feel miles apart. What did I do? I pushed her away again like an idiot. I want to apologize to her about what I did. And I want to explain why I stopped talking to her, but I don't think right now is the best time to do that.

"Big surprise, yeah," I mutter. "It's cold out here."

It's the only thing I can think of saying. I'm a walking cliché, talking about the weather since it's the first thing that came to mind. Anyway, I'm just prolonging an awkwardness between the two of us, thinking that awkward talking is better than tension-filled silence.

"Yeah, it is. It's like the South Pole," Piper replies. I almost laugh at that because that is totally something Piper would say, but I reign it in.

"It's like the deep South Pole if there was one," I add dumbly. "There isn't, though."

I want to smack myself upside the head. Even if I could manage to smack myself without Piper noticing, we are a foot or two away from her front door. Right then, Piper turns around and looks at me straight in the eyes. She's trying to convey something to me behind that look, but I am too embarrassed to look back at her, so I avert my gaze somewhere else.

"Um, thanks for walking me to my door."

"Yeah, again, it was great seeing you," I tell her the truth. "Again."

"You too."

I'm about to do something ballsy because I know this could be my last chance ever seeing her again. There's no way she'd want to talk to me or to see me again after today's disaster. So I go for it. I'm going to kiss her because, well, fuck it, why not?

Piper, however, thought we were going to hug. What happens after that is basically us dry humping each other. Talk about fucking awkward. My arms around her and hers around me, but instead of just hugging like normal people, we are literally thrusting are hips towards each other.

"Ow," Piper says, pulling back with a strange glint in her eye. "Take care."

I turn around to walk away fast. "You too."

And with that, I rush to my car. Slowly, I open the door and slide into my seat. I am calm for a matter of two seconds before I hit my seat with my back and bang on the steering wheel with my palm in a fit of fury.

"Stupid, stupid, stupid!" I yell, still hitting my steering wheel. "What the hell?!"

This time, I start again with hitting the seat behind me, my hands gripping the wheel tightly. I stare straight ahead, wanting to literally go crawl in a hole for what I did today. Not just what I did at the diner, but how I went in for the kiss and then ended up dry humping her.

After I let that anger leave my body, I hit the visor above me, knocking over the papers that are stored underneath its flap. Then I start having a conversation with my hands. I'm slowly going crazy, I swear. I keep talking to myself, muttering something about "deep South Pole" until I turn my head to the side and notice a mess of blonde hair.

Fuck, it's Piper. And she literally just witnessed that whole showdown. It's official. I'm done for. There's no way Piper is going to talk to me ever again. Good job, Vause. Good fucking job. You really nailed it this time.

Calming myself down, I roll down the window.

"I left my gloves in the car," she says.

"Oh." I reach over and find them, handing them to her with care and trying not to break down and cry. "There you go."

"Thanks," Piper says as she grabs them and stands up from the crouched position she is currently in. Then she turns and walks away, back towards the warmth of her house and away from her crazy ex-best friend who is now an asshole as well. I raise my hand to say a silent goodbye again. Then I roll up the window, fix the visor and start my drive of shame back to my mother's house.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: Wow, thanks for the warm reception to the story! I'm happily surprised. **

****P.S. don't expect this frequent of updates. I had some free time today, but I have a lot of projects coming up soon. Oh, and reviews are cool :)****


	4. Crush

Chapter Four: Crush

_Piper's POV_

"Heard the hot best friend is back in town, sis," my younger brother Cal says with a huge grin on his face. I'm not sure that he knows that Alex is gay, but I think he will find out soon enough. For some reason, I don't think my time seeing Alex is over. Even if she was the biggest asshole in the world a few days ago.

"Cal, stay away. Trust me, she's not interested," I tell him, nudging him with my shoulder to throw him a little off kilter. It's weird seeing him back at home from college for winter break. It's his senior year at New York University, and he has decided to continue 'No Shave November' into December as well, so he has a full-on lumberjack beard adorning his face.

"Everyone's interested in this," Cal jokes while stroking his beard as if that makes him appear more appealing. It doesn't. He just looks like my derpy little brother. I laugh and shake my head at him before heading from the living room to the kitchen.

My mom has been clanking around in the kitchen all day, and I know she has some special meal prepared for tonight's dinner. Why? I have no idea. But I'm also a little bit scared to ask her why she is going all out for dinner tonight. It's not like December 20th is an important day, especially when Christmas and Christmas Eve are only days away.

"What's with the huge feast?" I ask my mom.

That's when Cal decides to burst into the living room. But he's not alone. Standing next to my scruffy younger brother stands the woman I have tried to get out of my mind for the last decade of my life. Alex.

"Oh, I didn't tell you?" Cal sneers. He knew about this the whole time, yet he decided to play me and make it seem like he found out that Alex is in Hillon by some other way. I'm going to strangle him once Alex leaves tonight.

I really am not thinking anything about Cal, though, once Alex fully steps into the kitchen with a sad look in her eyes. I want to hug her, but I know I am supposed to mad at her for the stunts she played at lunch. Because I know her so well, I understand that she was trying to put on a front for me, trying to impress me. She just came across as a huge ass.

"I thought you'd want to have her over. I heard she's only in town for a few days, isn't that right Alex?" My mom asks sweetly. Surprisingly, she is nice to Alex, considering she didn't really like her too much when we were in high school all those years ago. Maybe it's because Alex is a hotshot now, and, well, I'm not.

"Yeah, that's right," she replies back to my mom in a fake voice that I would know anywhere. It's the voice she always used in high school when she had to talk with some authoritative figure.

"Well, dinner will be ready in thirty minutes, so why don't you and Piper go catch up before that?" I want to strangle my mom. For some reason, she must feel the tension between us. And I know for a fact that dinner is ready now; she just wants us to talk out our problems.

Taking a second to compose myself, I motion for Alex to follow me to my room, not like she needs any direction on how to get there. She used to sneak into my room almost twice a week back in high school. Her excuse would be that she hated being home alone while her mom worked the night shift, and, looking back, I think it's probably a combination of that and the fact that she liked me.

While walking silently up the steps, I process exactly what happened between us that day ten years ago. Part of me wishes that I loved Alex in that way too, but, back then, I was a self-absorbed teenager who wanted to mostly fit in with the crowd. Even though I loved hanging with Alex, she was always only one part of who I was in my glory days.

But now? With Alex back in my life, for however brief, it makes me reconsider a lot of things that I dismissed in high school. There were many times that I felt lost without Alex by my side. I remember craving Alex's presence and missing the times she wasn't with me. I recall the times I felt butterflies when she would grab my hand or tell me something cheesy.

I still don't know what all of that means, though.

Opening my door to my room, I silently wonder what Alex is going to think of how different it looks now. It's more adult. I stripped off the wallpaper and painted it a deep red instead, accenting the room with rich browns seen in chairs and desks and bed sheets. There are candles in every nook and cranny of the room, with some more resting on my desk and side tables. I run over to grab my lighter and start lighting them before realizing it seems like I am setting the mood.

And I don't want to lead Alex on, especially if I am really confused by her. I still can feel the spot on my leg where she placed her hand on the ride home after lunch three days ago. It's etched in my memory and I can't get rid of it. It felt...nice.

"Wow, your room looks different," Alex states, unsure of how to proceed. It's a little awkward between us, but I think the reason for that is because Alex believes that I feel awkward so she is trying to keep her distance.

"Yeah, I figured I couldn't keep the pink wallpaper anymore," I chuckle.

Alex, dressed in all black per usual, slips off her jacket and throws it over my desk chair. She's already making herself at home like she did in high school. I'm waiting for her to plop down on my bed and pat the space next to her, inviting me to join her in secrets and whispers. But she doesn't. Instead, she stands there with her hands jammed in her pockets—the sign that means she is nervous or mad or angry. Or all three.

"I'm…"

"Al…"

We both start talking at the same time, and that causes us to both laugh a little. Finally, I feel the tension leave Alex's body and she starts to smile that grin that I knew all too well ten years ago. This is the Alex I missed. I didn't miss the show off, asshole Alex. She was always more than that to me. _Is _more than that to me.

"Go ahead," I say, egging her on.

"I'm—well, ok, Pipes, I'm sorry. For all of it."

My heart thumps a little faster in my chest. I'm not sure what is causing the thumping but it has to deal something with the sincerity and kindness in which Alex said that. The look in her eyes is pleading—she wants me to understand she never meant to hurt me. My eyes start to well up with tears, and some start to roll down my cheek involuntarily.

"Why did you never tell me?" I whisper, even though there is no need to talk quietly. Slowly, I make my way over to where Alex is standing by my desk. She's leaning against the chair, trying not to stare at me in the eyes. I'm not sure she's ever seen me cry like this. Before I know it, I am mere inches away from her face.

For a second, I think she is going to kiss me. And if she did, I'd have no idea how to respond. Would I kiss her back? Would I pull away? Do I want that?

_No, you are just friends, _I tell myself mentally. But is that really true?

"Because I was afraid," she whispers back. "How do you tell your best friend that you loved her? That you loved her ever since the first time you laid eyes on her?"

And I see where she is coming from. I could barely pass an anonymous note to my crush back in the early days of high school. I wish she would have at least told me that she didn't like boys. She totally kept me in the dark on that one. Not that it really surprised me when she told me inadvertently.

"You were my best friend, Al. I wouldn't have judged you. But you just left and never looked back. You left me," I say sincerely. "I came by your house every day all summer, although I am sure you know that. If your mom was home, she would come up with some bullshit lie about you doing something. By leaving me, Al, you broke _my_ heart."

I watch as her face crumples inward, and I can tell she never really thought of how I felt. Yeah, I bet she knew that I had a rough summer without my best friend, but she probably thought more about how she put herself out there than about how I was taking it. And now here we are ten years later, with so many things to say to each.

"I'm sorry, Piper," she says again, stepping forward a foot to wrap her arms around me in a hug. Sighing, I melt into the embrace and am comforted by the touch because it reminds me of so many times spent together in high school. Tears start to form in my eyes, and I am overcome with a sense of sadness that I cannot give her what she wanted in high school—what she probably still wants to this day.

"So where do we go from here?" My voice asks, coming out strained and patchy. The tears have stopped a little, but I am still extremely saddened by everything that has happened to us over the last years.

Pulling away from the hug, Alex goes back to leaning on my desk chair, her hands finding their way back to her front pockets. She gives me a slight shrug of her shoulders, and I can tell she is a little embarrassed about the conversation and hug that just occurred. The look in her emerald eyes tells me that she loves me more than she can possibly say. But can I convey the same thing back to her without giving her false hope?

"I'm not sure," she tells me bluntly.

And then I say the dreaded words that I can't help but say:

"Friends?"

* * *

><p>It's been a day since Alex and I officially made up, and I feel like I am back in high school again. We exchanged cell phone numbers and have been texting non-stop about trivial and stupid little things—the same type of stuff we talked about back in the day. It feels so normal and so comforting. I missed this, missed having a best friend again.<p>

"What's on your mind?" A deep male voice asks me as I clean a beer glass with a washcloth. I'm standing behind the bar in my usual position, serving drinks and flirting with drunk men to earn more tips.

However, this deep voice belongs to a very hot man. A very, very hot and sober man. I've never seen him before, which is surprising since this town is so small that there are never any knew people frequenting the bar. I feel blush slowly creeping up my neck and to my face. Setting the glass down on the counter, I look him straight in the eyes.

His eyes are a dark blue and remind me of an ocean at night, with the moon glinting of the still surface. His brown hair is shaved eloquently and is styled perfectly with a little swoosh of the hair at the end. A body like a god is the only way I can describe his physique—his pressed black suit fits him perfectly.

Realizing that I've been staring down this stranger instead of asking what he'd like to drink—or at least answer his question—I quickly snap out of my haze. He's giving me a slight smile, egging me to answer him. He knows he has me.

"I have one guess as to what's on your mind," he replies coolly, flirting with me unabashedly.

"Oh, you do?" I say innocently. I try to play up the cute side of me because it's the side that every guys has always loved. It pulls them into my web, and I can spin them however I want once I have them entrapped. It's glorious.

"Yeah."

A pause.

"Would you—um—like a drink?" I stumble out.

"Piper," he says, looking down at my nametag. "I actually would not like a drink."

"Oh?"

"Yeah, can I would like a date instead?"

Before I can answer, I see a mass of black hair coming towards me. I watch as a smile turns into a frown as my friend walks over to me. I'm trying to both keep the conversation with hot-date-asking-guy in front of me and trying to appease my friend. It's an impossible task because deep down, I know Alex doesn't want to see me with someone else—romantically.

"So, that date?"

Alex is in hearing range, and I watch as she cringes slightly at the words. But this guy is hot, and I am sucker for hot people. It's a bad habit, I know, but I can't help it. And he seems funny. Why wouldn't I give it a chance? The last date I've been on was over a year ago. I mean, I've had my slew of hook-ups, but nothing more than that. And God knows my mom is pushing me to move out of the house and to settle down.

"Sure," I say.

He extends out his hand to grab mine, pressing his lips down gently and briefly on the back of my hand. Alex is a step away from the counter now, and I watch as she tries to keep a smile on her face. She's actually doing a pretty good job at disguising her sadness, but I know her more than the average person does, and I can tell.

"My name's Eric," he tells me. "I'll pick you up at 7 pm tomorrow."

With that, he hands me a card with his number on it and walks away without so much as a fleeting glance. Alex moves into the now vacant spot, resting her long arms on the countertop. Pushing her glass up to the top of her head, she gives me this look.

"The boys always loved you, Pipes," she chuckles, trying to play off her jealousy. At this moment in time, I am reminded specifically of all the times that boys would cling to me during parties and dances in high school.

"Hey, what are you doing tonight?" She asks me before I reply to the comment she made previously. I can tell she's nervous asking me, as if she believes this to be some type of date or something of that nature.

"Al, you do realize it is already 7 in the evening right?"

"Oh, yeah, right…."

"But I'm off work in thirty minutes," I smile.

"Right, um, cool. Wanna go see The Notebook? They're having some special playing at the theater, and I know how much you loved that movie back in high school," she asks me, never looking me in the eye.

This is one of those times I don't want to lead her on, but, at the time, it's what we did when we're friends back in high school. And since we are trying the whole friends thing again, I want it to be normal.

"You hated that movie, Alex," I laugh. She always would call me out for crying at the ending. She never let me live it down.

"Well, I've come around since then."

I roll my eyes at her, playfully hitting her on the arm. She takes me hand as I start to swat it at her and puts in back down on the counter. She's about to let go of my hand when I do something unthinkable, something I never would have thought of doing. I hold on to it. I don't let go. She looks down at my hand, questioning, before slipping hers out from under mine.

"So, movie?"

And with the nod of my head, I've affirmed, in one night, to go on basically two dates in the span of two days. One with my best friend who loves me and one with a hot stranger. Nothing could go wrong right?

_Why do I keep running from the truth?_

_All I ever think about is you._

_You got me hypnotized, so mesmerized_

_And I've just got to know._

_Do you ever think when you're all alone_

_All that we can be, where this thing can go?_

_Am I crazy or falling in love?_

_Is it real or just another crush?_

_Do you catch a breath when I look at you?_

_Are you holding back like the way you do?_

'_Cause I'm trying and trying to walk away_

_But I know this crush ain't going away._

**A/N: Sorry it's been a while since the last update. Now, don't kill me because I'm adding in another love interest. Piper is only friends with Alex (at this time in the story *wink wink*), so she isn't going to hold up her love life because of Alex. But things might get interesting soon...**

**Reviews are alright, I guess. **


	5. Jealous

Chapter Five: Jealous

_Alex's POV_

'_Cause you're too sexy, beautiful _

_And everybody wants a taste._

_That's why, that's why,_

_I still get jealous._

* * *

><p>Christmas lights line the outsides of the numerous shops on Main Street. There's a huge pine tree with sparkling lights and dazzling ornaments in the center of the town, with soft music drifting in and out, playing along with the wind. And right next to me is Piper.<p>

Piper with her blonde hair loosely falling out of her winter hat. With her black pea coat and red scarf. With her cherry-red nose from the cold. Piper, standing next to me. This is what I love. This is what I missed so much in my last ten years of living. Because, when I look back on that decade without Piper, I realize how much I stopped living.

She told me the other day that she wanted us to become friends again, so, of course, I fell for her trap. Like I had any other choice. I couldn't have said no if I wanted to say no. She has this strong hold over me, and I can't pry her fingers away from her iron grip on my heart. I want to reach down and take said fingers in mine, but I can't find the bravery or courage to put my heart on the line again, knowing that she will break it into smaller pieces. So I keep my hands by my side, content to just be in her presence.

"Tell me about that guy at the bar," I ask as we walk down Main Street towards the only movie theater in town. It's a small little theater—cute and quaint with only two showing rooms that fit about 30 people maximum.

I watch a smile slowly creep onto Piper's face—that is until she notices that she's smiling and immediately wipes it off her face as if it was a piece of food that could be easily thrown away. But I know she is trying to be sensitive to my feelings. She probably (ok, she does) know that I still like her on some level.

"His name's Eric. That's honestly all I know. He came into the bar and asked me out on a date, as simple as that. I mean, Al, it's been so long since someone asked me out," she says.

I try to be happy for her, but all I can think about is how beautiful she looks with snowflakes falling on her hat and with her talking so animated. If only Piper could see herself through my eyes, she'd see how lucky anyone would be to have her.

Without warning, a flashback from hours earlier pops into my mind—the time when Piper didn't let go of my hand. She held on until I managed to pull myself together enough to pull my hand away. I don't want her to feel obligated to have some sort of feelings for me. I don't want her holding my hand because she thinks it will make me happy. No, I want her to want me all on her own accord and heart.

That's what I want.

"Alex? Hello?" Piper's waving her hands in front of my face, trying to snap me out of my daze. She succeeds, and I look over to her, smiling.

"Piper? Hi?" I respond back jokingly, earning a shove of the shoulder from Piper. The sound of her laughing sends my senses into overdrive and my heart into cardiac arrest. I wish I could love her like I want to love her.

"We're here," she tells me simply. I bring my head up to notice that we are standing right in front of the movie theater. Holding the door open for her, Piper steps into the warm insides of the theater with me trailing behind her.

While in line for popcorn, I feel someone staring at me. Turning around to find the person behind the burning stare, I come face to face with one of Piper and mine's old classmate. Her name is Jules, and, man, did she grow up from high school. She's tall with sweeping brown hair and chestnut eyes. Her cheekbones are what every girl wishes for, and, best of all, she's giving me a look I know _all too well_.

"Alex Vause and Piper Chapman? The two best friends are reunited?" Jules says with a fake gasp as if she could never picture this. I remember in high school that Jules always would throw me off with comments suggesting she knew about my dating preference, but she never actually came out and said it. And I know she probably knew of my crush on Piper because of the way she is glancing at me right now.

"Jules?" Piper pipes up. We both turn around to face her, ignoring our spot in the line.

Giving Jules look over, I return my gaze to her eyes, smirking ever so slightly. She's eye-fucking me at the moment, and I am going to use this to my advantage with Piper. Maybe, I can make her jealous of me as bad as that sounds.

"So, are you two on a date?" Jules asks us.

I watch as Piper's face turns a nice shade of red before I answer for the both of us. "Uh, actually we are just here as friends. You know, like old times."

A 'hmmmm' comes out of Jules' mouth before she reaches into her purse and pulls out her phone, sliding her finger on the screen to unlock it and scrolling through the apps to find the one she wants.

"Well, if you aren't on a date tonight, maybe you'll give me your number and I'll take you out on a date tomorrow?" Jules hands over her phone with a smile on her face.

Indulging in her request only because why not, I take the phone out of hands and see she pulled up the contact app. I type in my name and number, sending myself a quick text with her phone so that I have her number as well.

"Text me," I say, turning back around as Jules walks away. When I face Piper, I met with a fiery look in her eyes. And, in this moment, I swear that Piper likes me like I like her. That we aren't just friends, and she's realized her true feelings for me. Because maybe sometimes friendship can turn into love. Maybe, just maybe.

"You're seriously going to go on a date with her?" Piper asks me incredulously. Folding her arms over her chest, Piper stubbornly refuses to take the bucket of popcorn as we walk into the showing room.

"I mean, yeah," I say. "Why not?"

Even if I didn't agree to a date only to make Piper jealous, it doesn't mean I am not allowed to go on dates just because I love her. It's not like anything is going to come from loving Piper, right?

"You barely know her!" I shush Piper as we take out seats in the crowded theater. The previews are playing, and people are glaring at us to shut up once we sit down. Taking some popcorn and throwing it into my mouth, I turn my attention to the screen. After a moment, I swivel my head to whisper to Piper.

"You barely know Eric, either. Why do you care so much, kid?"

Before Piper has a chance to reply, the theater goes dark and the beginning of the movie starts to roll on the screen. Piper slides down in her seat, apparently getting comfortable for the next two hours. I stay straight up, too focused on my nerves and on the placement of Piper's arm next to mine.

An hour passes, and the movie is starting to become "good" in Piper's mind. Or, at least, that's what she told me in high school when she forced me to watch it with her. I'm waiting for the end because that's when Piper bawls like a little baby—and I made sure to bring Kleenex this time just in case.

The popcorn is sitting in my lap, and I reach my hand into the bucket to grab a handful of the tasty movie treat. Apparently, Piper has the same craving because she stretches her hand into the abundance of popcorn the same time I do, our hands accidently bumping into each other's.

I go to remove my hand first, peeking a glance at Piper out of the corner of my eye. I expected her to be looking at me with a grin on her face, but, instead, she is trying really hard to keep watching the movie. Why? I don't know. She's confusing the shit out of me these days.

The one thing I do notice, though, is Piper biting her lip, as if she is trying to hold something in that she really wants to get out. At first, I think it might be tears even though it isn't the sad part of the movie yet. I mean, yeah, it's the part where Noah sees Allie for the first time in years, but it isn't the sad part of the film.

Not trying to be cliché or anything, I put my arm around the back of Piper's seat. It's a habit I've formed from going on countless dates with others in the past, and I think nothing of it at the moment. That is, until Piper leans into me. That's when my heart stops—when she puts her head on my shoulder. I feel her breath on my neck, her shoulder against mine. But I don't say anything or move an inch and neither does she.

The warmth that spreads through my body is unlike any other feeling, and I swear that I'm on cloud nine currently. And I never want to come down. Even if this means nothing than a friend snuggling up on another friend, I don't care. It's something, and I love it.

As the final scene of The Notebook comes to a close, I finally decide to take a peek at Piper and notice tears streaming down her face. Something about this movie gets her every time, and I wonder what it is. I don't have to wait long to find the answer.

"I want a love like that. One that is so strong that I can't live without my love," Piper whispers, her head still on my shoulder. The credits keep rolling and we keep sitting in the same position until the theater is empty. Only then do we both move from our spots and stand up. Piper looks like a shy puppy as we make our way out to the snow-covered streets.

Cars whiz by us as Piper and I stroll down the sidewalk back to where I parked. It's at least a seven minute walk, and I want to say something, to say anything, but I am at a loss for words. The air around us is thick with unspoken words and feelings—at least to me. Finally, I find my voice and am about to speak up when my phone dings.

Pulling out my phone, I unlock it to see that I received a message from none other than Jules. Man, is she quick on the turnaround. I notice Piper trying to see who texted me, and I decide to make it easier on her without her realizing it. Lowering my phone and tilting it towards Piper, I read the message.

**From: Jules **

** Dinner tomorrow at Nino's. Shoot me your address and I'll pick you up :)**

I shut my phone without responding, knowing it's rude to text while you're with other people. Piper tries to play it off as if she didn't read my text, and we continue to walk in a delicate silence, our feet crunching on the snow-ice below us.

"I can't believe Christmas is only days away," Piper speaks up, breaking the silence that has overcome us. I nod my head agreeing. "The best gift I have ever received is you coming back to Hillon. I've missed you, Alex. I finally feel whole again with you back in my life."

Piper stops in her tracks right before I am about to open the passenger door of my rental car for her. She's facing the door one second, and, the next second, she is facing me—only a few inches separating us. Her blue eyes find mine, and I know I am about to lose it in a few seconds if she doesn't look or turn away.

This is it, I think.

And it is.

Piper grabs my face with her hands and pulls me even closer towards her. There's a glint in her eyes as she slides one hand away from my jaw and down to my waist, effectively trapping me against her. Our bodies are pressed against the door of the car, and I'm surprised the car alarm hasn't gone off yet.

But I don't want to kiss her. I mean, I do but I want to make sure she actually means it. Piper, sensing my hesitation by the stiffness of my arms on my sides, forces me to look at her. And what I see in her eyes is permission—permission to her heart.

So I go for it. After fourteen years of lust and admiring from afar, I finally get what has evaded me. Piper's lips softly touch mine, and I almost fall on the ground. My knees are weak and, if Piper didn't have one arm around my waist, I surely would have fallen. But I need to regain control. That's just who I am.

Telling myself to snap out of it, I push Piper harder against the door of the car, pressing my lips onto hers with more force—not too much but not too little. The way her lips feel against mine is like finally knowing what heaven is. And now that I know, I don't want to stop knowing.

My hands move up to Piper's hand, entangling themselves in her blonde hair and throwing her winter hat to the white colored ground. I sigh into the kiss, feeling alive for the first time in years. Her lips are moving against mine when I suddenly feel her tongue slip between my lips. She tightens her grip on my waist, peeling her other hand off my face and joining her other arm to pull me into a tight embrace.

I don't want to pull away, ever, but I am forced to do so when a loud sound jerks us apart. The car alarm finally went off, leaving us both flustered and surprised at the same time. Piper, who I am sure hasn't really processed what just happened, is looking at the ground. Fiddling with the keys, I find the button to turn off the alarm and go to open the door for Piper.

"Tha—thanks," Piper stutters before quickly going into the car. I walk around the other side and hop in, turning on the car. I make a move to turn on the heat, but I don't think either of us are particularly cold at the moment.

I put the car into drive and set off to Piper's house to take her home. I want to ask her what that kiss was all about because friends sure as hell don't kiss like that, but I can't manage to say anything because of the fear of ruining what just transpired.

The car ride ends as soon as it starts—or so it feels. Pulling into Piper's driveway, I turn the car off. Neither of us makes a move to exit the car. This is the time to say something to Piper. As I open my mouth to speak, Piper does, too, and beats me to it.

"Alex, I'm so sorry. I'm just—I'm…" Piper trails off, tears trailing down her face. I'm not sure exactly why she is crying but I know what triggered it. The kiss. And this is where I have to stand up for myself.

"Piper," I say. "Look at me."

She turns her head slowly.

"You can't fuck with me, ok? I can't handle it. I already broke my heart over you once and I don't think my heart can handle it breaking over you again."

Piper doesn't say anything. I don't say anything.

"I don't know, Al. I just don't know."

And I know what she means. She can't understand her feelings. She's confused and lost and scared. But I don't know if it's a good thing or a bad thing, and that's killing me. So I let her go. I do what I know to do.

"It's ok, Pipes. Just go inside and we'll talk later."

"I love you, but I don't know if I _love _you."

"I know. Sleep on it. I'm not leaving you again."

"Don't you love me, too?" Piper asks like a small child.

"Yes, Piper, I love you, too."

Piper nods, and I let her walk away.


	6. Get it on the Low

Chapter Six: Get it on the Low

_Alex's POV_

The door slams behind me as I make my way into the kitchen of my mother's house. I hear mumbling from the living room but decide to ignore the voices, choosing instead to focus my attention on finding the strongest bottle of alcohol in the house. Scanning the cabinets, I find the one that holds my mom's liquor and wine, opening it with tremendous force. My mom loves her wine, but she always has a small stock of strong liquor hidden behind the tall bottles of red and white wine.

Pushing away a bottle of wine, I find a handle of 99 Berries. Perfect. Now, I rack my mind trying to think if I should make a mixed drink or if I should take straight shots. I weigh my options, ultimately deciding on making a mixed drink with about four shots in it. Four shots is enough for one drink—it's probably way more than enough, and I know my drink is going to turn out strong. But that's how I like them.

"Al? Is that you?" I hear my mom call out to me from the living room. I know I need to respond, but no words want to come out of my mouth right now. Not until I am drunk enough to be numbed of my feelings over what occurred tonight.

I want to tell my mom about the kiss. She always told me growing up that one day Piper will realize her feelings for me, but I always dismissed it because why would she like me? Let's be real here: Piper didn't even know that I loved her until I told her the night of graduation.

"Yeah, it's me, ma."

I sigh, swirling my drink around with a spoon before bringing it up to my lips and taking a long and much needed sip. The sip is sweet, and it automatically reminds me of the sweetness of Piper's lips on mine. The way her hands tangled into my hair. How she cried during the car ride home because she doesn't know.

I take another drink.

"Come here. Tiff and I were just talking about you." The way my mom says 'Tiff' makes me want to vomit, and I am not even drunk in the slightest yet. My mom makes it sound like the two are best friends, but I know my mom is putting on a nice front because it's my job to keep Tiffany happy. Not that she's at all happy about being cooped up in Hillon.

Knowing I need to leave Hillon soon because of Tiffany turns my sour mood even sourer. I want to stay here forever. Or at least until I sort things out with Piper, especially after tonight's escapades. It's only a few days until Christmas, and, after that, I plan on heading back out to California. We're already days behind now because of this little detour.

"Your mom is much less of a devil than you, Vause," Tiffany explains as soon as I walk into the small living. Both of the tiny couches are taken by my mom and Tiffany, so I opt for the rocking chair next to the blazing fire. And, again, I take another sip of my drink.

"Awesome," I say with a bite. "What's up, ma?"

My mom is wrapped up in a quilted blanket with a glass of wine on the table next to the couches. She picks it up, takes a nice long drink and gives me a look. She knows something is up with me. Ever since day one, my mother has had this intuition to know when I'm trying to hide things from her—and even myself. This time, I blame the alcohol as the giveaway.

"Oh, nothing. You just seem in a funk."

This is definitely code for 'I know something happened with you and Piper, and, once Tiffany goes to bed, we're talking.' Or something along those lines. I shake my head. And, of course, take another sip of the drink (which, by the way, is already starting to go to my head).

"I'm just a little tired," I say, wondering why Tiffany is so quiet. "Oh, Tiffany, I'm booking us a flight out to California the day after Christmas."

With that, I bid my goodnights and head upstairs to my cramped room. My head swirls around the information of what happened tonight. How I let Piper go. Maybe if I wouldn't have let her go she would've stayed on her own accord. But we're best friends—were best friends—and I know her. She's scared of facing things head on. No matter what I would've said to her, Piper would've left without affirming or disaffirming anything in regards to her feelings for me. She flees. And nothing I could've said or done would have kept her in my arms.

A feeling of dread rushes through my body because, now that Piper kissed me, I have hope. And I know what hope can do. It can crush you. And it leaves you scared and worried while it also leaves you happy and, well, hopeful. Hope is the best thing in the world—yet the most dangerous.

While I wonder what made Piper change her mind about me, I manage to block out all other noise. My mind goes into overdrive, and I find myself recalling certain memories from high school when I truly believed that Piper loved me. That she didn't realize that she loved me but deep down she did.

**11 years ago: **

_Tears are the only thing that I notice when Piper comes busting through my bedroom door unannounced. I'm leaning against the backboard of my bed, a bottle of beer firmly in my one hand as music blasts through my ratty speakers. It's a Saturday night, and, knowing Piper had a date with some guy, I decided to get wasted. Normally, Piper and I spend Saturdays together, and, with the change of plans, the jealousy in me erupted—leaving me with my thoughts and alcohol. _

_ I set my beer on my side table as Piper crashes onto my bed face first. I leave her alone for a few seconds. While on my bed, Piper either consciously or unconsciously snuggles closer to me, her body cuddling up against the right side of my body. My heart is beating ferociously, and I hope that Piper can't feel my heartbeat. _

_ As if she read my mind, Piper picks her head up, wipes her tears away and gives me a sad smile before placing her head on my lap. This causes every nerve in my body to become on high alert. Still, Piper doesn't say anything. Instead, I think she's content on laying on me without speaking. I know I need to break the silence first. _

_ "Hey," I say quietly, even though there is no reason for me to whisper. It's only me in my house. My mom's off working one of her jobs. And the music is actually still bumping through my room, which probably made my whisper almost inaudible. _

_ "Hi." Piper snuggles closer to me, her tear streaked face sitting on top of my thighs._

_ "Want a beer?" _

_ I know she doesn't want to talk about whatever made her cry. The look on her face when I offer her alcohol is priceless. Her parents are all against underage drinking, but it's because they don't think teenager can handle their drink. But I can. My mom never restricted it from me, which gave me less reason to rebel against her and get wasted all the time. No, I just like my occasional beer or glass of wine. _

_ "But I drove here," she says with wide eyes. I shrug my shoulders in response._

_ "So stay the night."_

_ "Are you sure?" I shake my head yes and stand up to go retrieve the rest of my stash of alcohol. I already know it's going to be a fun night—Piper's never drank before, and I plan on getting her drunk._

_ Less than one hour later, I get my wish. Piper's bopping all over the place, dancing along with the pop radio station she put on. She knows I hate mainstream music, but, at this point drunk off her mind, she could give two fucks. And that's fine with me. _

_ "You're always here for me, Al. Always. Why?" _

_ So, Piper is one of _those _drunks. Great. I didn't feel like having a heart to heart with her tonight, but I guess it's going to happen anyway. Hopefully, she will become drunk enough to not remember any of this in the morning. _

_ "Because I love you," I say truthfully. There's no reason for me to hold out._

_ "I love you," Piper replies back. And the way she says it, I swear she means it like the way I meant it. _

_ Piper walks over to my bed and proceeds to sit on my lap facing me, and, holy shit, this is making me all flustered. This is not the Piper I know, and it fuels my thoughts that maybe she likes me. Like, likes me likes me. _

_ "Piper…" I trail off, and she shushes me. _

_ "You're the best, Alex. The very best." _

_ Piper starts to lean in, and I am questioning what the fuck is actually going on right now. I swear this has to be a dream. Before Piper goes any further, her eyes go wide. She hops off me and sprints to my bathroom. And then, when I hear her puking, I follow her into my bathroom and pull back her hair while she continues. _

_ That's the moment when I know she won't remember any of this the next morning, and I can't determine whether that makes me sad or happy._

My phone buzzes, pulling me out of my daze. Part of me hopes it is Piper calling or texting me. But another part of me is scared to think it is her. Scared to think of what she would say. When I pick up my phone, however, I am surprised.

**From: Jules**

** No text back? I'm slightly offended. **

She throws in one of those 'sly face' emojis, making it seem as though she is only messing with me. That she actually isn't offended—just mock offended. I roll my eyes despite the fact that no one is around to see it before I text her back.

**To: Jules**

** Don't be offended. I was at a movie, remember? But dinner sounds great. **

With that, I shut my off my phone, chug the rest of my drink and turn on my stereo.

Music is what I need right now.

* * *

><p>Wine in our cups and food on our plates, Jules and I are sitting face-to-face, having an actually decent conversation. If I didn't feel the way I felt for Piper, I think there could have been something between us. After a sip of wine, Jules looks up at me and smiles.<p>

"Ok, Jules, I have to ask. How did you know?" I ask coyly, my signature smirk making its way onto my face. I can tell that she has no idea what I am talking about. But I let her try to figure it out.

"Know what?" She asks.

"That I liked girls in high school. Don't lie. You gave me this looks all the time, kid. So, spill. How did you know?"

Jules starts laughing, placing her wine glass back down on the table until her chuckles subside. Then she leans closer to me as if she is about to share with me the most important secret in the world. Her eyes are twinkling, and, for a second, I forget all about Piper and whatever is happening with us.

"Come on, the way you looked at Piper—well, anyone who had eyes could tell. And you never even gave any guys the time of day. It was so obvious, Alex!"

I am about to respond back with a flirty comment because, well, why not until my eyes settle on the couple that just entered the establishment. My stomach automatically drops, and I try not to change my demeanor, but I know my smile has started to fade.

Jules turns her head the moment I turn mine, and she knows why I stopped smiling. Why my eyes are wide and my heart is heavy. In the back of Jules' mind, she had to know I am still hung up on my high school crush. My best friend.

"Oh," she says when her eyes reach mine. "You still love her, don't you?"

I swallow, not wanting to answer. I don't want to hurt Jules, but, without even realizing it, I did. I agreed to go on a date to make Piper jealous, knowing that I would be leading my date on because I can't get over my feelings for my blonde best friend. Ex-best friend?

"Yes," I admit begrudgingly.

To my surprise, Jules doesn't look sad or disappointed. Instead, she gives me a little smile before turning her attention to Piper and who must be Eric as they talk with the maître d' about their seating, presumably. It looks as though the two other daters haven't notice Jules and me yet. Which could be a good thing.

"Alright," Jules says slowly before giving me an all-out grin. "Let's make her wish she never agreed to go on a date with that tool."

And, at that moment, I know Jules and I are going to become good friends. There's something about her that is really fucking cool, and I want to make sure she understands how much I appreciate her for doing this on a date.

"What do you have in mind?" I ask devilishly. Right as I say that, I take a quick glance at Piper and her date, who are now making their way over to their table. I hold my breath when I realize that there is an open table right next to our table.

"You don't think…" I start to say.

"No way," Jules states unbelievingly.

But it happens. Just my luck. I'm trying to hide myself from Piper and her date as they strut over towards their table. Of all the places and all the tables, Piper has to be in the same restaurant at the table next to me. Typical.

Of course, Piper notices me, giving me a very timid wave before letting her date—Eric, I think—pull out her chair for her. I watch as Piper tries not to look at me again. But she fails and her head turns to face me. What I see in her eyes is something I have never seen before: jealousy. It's like her body has been taken over by a green-eyed monster.

And I know I have her trapped. Right here, right now, Piper wants me, even if she doesn't realize it. Now, I need to play this in my advantage. Reaching over the table, I turn my gaze away from Piper and take Jules' hands in mine.

"You're amazing, Al," Jules tells me in a loud voice so that Piper can hear it. She even uses my nickname, knowing that it would get at Piper. "Honestly, I would love the chance to get to see you again after tonight."

I swear I hear Piper growl.

"You know what? I would like that, kid."

Glancing over at Piper, who is less than ten feet away from us, I notice her grip on her menu has tightened significantly. The funny thing is that I don't think her date has caught on yet that Piper is jealous. That she isn't into the date.

"And maybe we can head back to my place tonight?"

I'm about to respond when Piper audibly and loudly scoffs at the words that just came out of Jules' mouth. About to turn and chastise her for scoffing, Jules grabs my hands to stop me, raising her eyebrow and shaking her head as if telling me it isn't worth it.

Not right now.

"Eric, you are such a gentleman," Piper coos, finally putting herself into this little game that I've created. Making her jealous reaffirms that she does like me. It's a satisfying feeling. But I still think she's held back by the whole best friend thing with us.

"You want to get out of here now?" Jules asks me, knowing that Piper is getting to me as much as I am trying to get to her. Even though I know that Piper is trying to get back at me, it still hurts to see her on a date with someone else.

And I know Piper thinks highly of this guy despite kissing me the other night.

"Yeah," I reply back with a smirk on my face.

Jules walks over to where I am standing to help me up before placing a kiss on my cheek and pretending to whisper something sweet into my ear.

"Pretend I said something cute to make you laugh," she whispers, her breath tickling my ear as she speaks. I laugh like she says, and Piper gives me the death glare.

"You ok, Piper?" Eric asks her once he notices that she isn't paying him any attention.

I am starting to walk away with Jules hand-in-hand when I hear Piper respond, her voice laced with jealousy. I want to laugh. Pull her close to me. Kiss her again. I want to make her see that I'm not just her best friend. That I've never stopped loving her. That she can find her forever with me. But she has to make the first move. I can't do it anymore.

So I keep walking.

"I'm actually not the hungry. How about drinks at your place?" I hear Piper say as I continue my trek outside, my hand still in Jules as she drags me along. I don't hear Eric's response because I'm already out the door.

"Ok, I'm going to go to your car and you're going to wait out here for Piper."

I'm about to ask why I would do that when the door bursts open, revealing a disheveled Piper without Eric. The guy must be paying the bill or something. Piper finds me right away. I shove my hands in my pocket and wait for her to start berating me about what happened in there.

But to my surprise, Piper gives me this look—this lust filled look. And it scares me a little because I'm not use to this Piper. I'm used to the reserved Piper. The girl who told me all of her problems, who cried in my room and who was afraid to make her parents upset. No, this isn't the Piper I know. And I wonder what changed her mind about me. What made her like this.

"Piper…"

I have no chance to keep talking because all of a sudden Piper is pushing me up against the brick wall of the restaurant. Her arms are tight around mine, locking me into her embrace whether I like it or not. Which, by the way, I like.

"Don't say another word."

And then Piper's lips are on mine again. It's a quick kiss, full of desire and passion and jealousy and anger. As soon as I realize what is happening, Piper is suddenly pushing off me and fixing her hair. Slowly, she backs away from me, turns around and goes towards the door.

Before she opens the door to go back to her date, she says something that sends desire coursing through my body.

"Think about that when you go back to your date's house."

Then she disappears inside, and I walk my dazed self back to my car where Jules is waiting there with a grin on her face. I think she enjoyed the fact that she got to piss off Piper and then bring us together all in the same night.

"So?"

"Thanks," I say, earning a shove from Jules with the instructions to drive us back to her house to celebrate. I put the car in drive and start humming, content with my life right now but equally as confused by Piper.

_I know you wanna get it on the low_

_Get it on the low, get in on the low_

_Don't be afraid, I'll never let him know_

_I can give it to you like you never had before_

_I don't mean to offend you_

_But this is something special_

_Can't keep it confidential anymore_

_I just need to tell somebody_

_Tell me if you got somebody else_

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I'm not sure how I feel about how this chapter turned out because I still believe Piper is confused about her feelings. But I also believe that she is one to get jealous easily and act on that jealousy. Are you guys a Jules fan now? Let me know! **

**Also, Leelan (guest), you totally guessed what I planned on writing for this chapter! Glad you enjoyed the previous chapter!**

**Oh, and if you ever want to know what songs are for each chapter, just look at the title for the chapter. This song was "Get it on the Low" by Hoodie Allen.**


	7. Whiskey

Chapter Seven: Whiskey

_Piper's POV_

Eric's cool hand grasps mine, leading me out of the restaurant and back to his car. Snow has started to fall from the dark sky and has coated me with a thin layer of wetness. I ignore it all: Eric's hand, the snow, the wetness. The only thing I can think about is the way Alex's lips felt against mine for the second time in two days. It's a good feeling—but a scary feeling, too.

It's weird. I grew up with Alex, not thinking of her in that way at all. And I'm not sure why I suddenly thought of her that way. After she professed her love for me in high school, I tried to wrap my head around the fact that my best friend had feelings for me for the entire duration of our friendship. I never considered what I actually felt about it and about her. Maybe it took ten years without her to realize that not being with her is awful.

But that's where the problem lies.

We're friends now. And I already saw what a declaration of love can do to a friendship. It broke us apart for ten years, and I am not sure I can go through that again. What if I tell Alex that I like her and then we end up not working out? I'll lose my best friend for the second time in my life. My heart cannot take that pain. Losing her that summer was the worst thing of my life, even to this day.

And, anyway, she already seems in love with Jules. Why would I ruin that, too?

My internal battle wages on as I slide into Eric's sleek black car, sitting on the cold leather of the seat as I wait for the heat to kick in. That's when I catch a peek at Eric at the wheel. His fingers are drumming along with whatever holiday tune is on the radio and his mouth is mouthing the lyrics. And at that moment, I smile. My mind momentarily forgets Brave Piper's move early outside the restaurant. It momentarily forgets Alex.

Instead, it knows that Perfect Piper can have a life with Eric. The life that I always dreamed of having. The life that my parents want me to have. The life that keeps me from losing my best friend. And that's when I decide, when I know I can't pursue Alex anymore. It's not worth the risk to lose her.

"Hey, let's head to the bar," I tell Eric, who originally told me earlier that he would just take me home instead because I looked stressed. "I'm feeling having a drink with a hot guy I just met the other day."

Eric feigns a "who, me?" look and changes course to head to the bar instead. Before I realize it, the bar I work at comes into sight, and I lick my lips in anticipation for the drinks I am about to consume. I'm thinking a Long Island Iced Tea for starters. In my haste to knock back a drink, I fail to notice Alex's car in the parking lot.

Lacing his fingers with mine, Eric leads me into the dingy bar I call home on most nights. Soft music is playing in the background. Christmas lights adorn the trimmings around the ceiling. And people are mingling with one another, drinks in hand. My mood instantly lightens, and I try not to think about telling Alex sorry for all the stuff I did to lead her on. Instead, I focus on ordering a drink and enjoying Eric's company.

"Could you order me a Long Island, babe?" I ask Eric sweetly, a toothy grin on display as I realize my bladder is about to explode. "I need to hit the powder room for a few minutes."

He nods his head, giving me a kiss on the cheek as if it is the most natural thing in the world for us. Then he lets go of my hand, allowing me to head to the bathroom. My insides are fluttering a little after that cheek peck, and I am still thinking about it all the way into the bathroom. A toilet flushes as soon as I enter, the door to the stall opening to reveal the one person I did not expect to see here.

"Piper?" Alex slurs. She's obviously quite intoxicated, and I am wondering how on earth she became that drunk in a matter of twenty to thirty minutes since I last saw her. Why would she get this roaring drunk after she left with Jules to presumably go back to her place?

"Alex? Why are you here? I thought you were going back to fuck Jules or whatever," I say viciously, wondering where the hell that came from. A second ago, I was all content and happy with Eric and the cheek kiss; I was already telling myself that Alex and I were nothing. And now? Well, I have no clue. Jealous Piper is coming out, apparently.

"Why are you here? Why aren't you with what's-his-face? Pretty boy," she tells me, washing her hands messily as only a drunk would do. "I mean, you kiss me than run off with some other guy like it's no big deal."

Wow, I thought I had made it clear earlier that I wanted Alex, even though now I want to take it back and to remain friends—just so I don't ruin our friendship with a failed relationship. It's the only logical thing I can do to salvage whatever it is we have now. But how do I break this to Alex less than an hour after I basically attacked her with my lips.

"You ran off with Jules, too. I'm not the bad guy here!" I exclaim.

"Whatever, Piper. I'm not going to deal with this," she tells me, huffing and storming out of the bathroom. I'm standing there confused as fuck at what actually just occurred before I decide to let it go because she is intoxicated.

Walking back out of the bathroom, I spot Eric chatting with the Jeff, the other bartender that I work with most nights. Jeff and Eric seem to be engrossed in a conversation, and I take that time to scan the room to find Alex and, most likely, Jules. Finally, my eyes spot them over near the billiards table. Alex is leaning against the table with a drink in her hand, watching Jules as she pulls back the pool stick and connects it with the cue ball. For a second, Alex looks up and catches my eye, returning her gaze shortly back to her date.

I feel like I'm back at the restaurant all over again, with both of us playing some "make the other person jealous" game. But I can't take it anymore. I already made up my mind. And now I have to find a way to tell Alex that she can have Jules. I have to tell her to ignore the two times I kissed her because I want us to be friends.

But I will save that conversation for a later time, I tell myself as I walk up to Eric, sliding my arms around his waist. He smells like good, but I want to slap myself for comparing his scent to Alex's because nothing is as intoxicating as her smell.

"Hey, here's your drink," he says, handing me the icy beverage. I take a long sip and enjoy the feeling of warmth that trickles down my throat. "And isn't that the two girls from the restaurant earlier?"

"Oh, yeah, I think it is," I say, feigning innocence. "So, tell me about yourself, Eric, since we never actually got to that part of the date yet."

He laughs a little before going into a soliloquy about his life growing up and his current job—a firefighter who loves to play the guitar for children at the hospital—and so on and so forth. He seems like the perfect guy, which makes me think there has to be some fatal flaw that I don't know about.

After he talks for a while, he excuses himself to go to the bathroom, and I am left sitting at the bar by myself, tapping my foot in rhythm with the music. Someone slides up onto the seat right next to me and starts talking.

"You like him? But you kissed me?" It's Alex. "I'm getting fucking whiplash her, Pipes. I told you that you can't fuck with my feelings. But here you are."

Now, she's super drunk.

"Alex, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to lead you on," I start to say as Alex's face begins to fall once she realizes what I'm about to tell her. "I just—I wanted to know what it felt like."

That's a bullshit lie, and Alex knows it, too.

"Say what you really mean, Piper."

She is staring at me, her green eyes burning holes into my blue ones. It's as if her eyes are daring me to tell her that I'm a coward who would rather hide behind a curtain of friendship than to explore the world behind it. And she's right. I am a coward. But a coward with a reason.

Time stands still as Alex keeps her eyes trained on me, and I struggle to find my words under her intense gaze. It's a battle, and I am about to lose. That is, until Eric stumbles his way back from the bathroom. When I notice him strutting over to me, I lower my gaze and turn around to face Eric, leaving Alex staring at nothing next to me. We both say nothing as she slides out of the seat and walks away.

And when she walks away, it feels like when she did ten years ago.

_Shoulda just called it like I saw it_

_Shoulda just called for help and ran like hell that day_

_The burn and the sting and the high and the heat_

_And the left me one more feeling when he kissed me_

_I shoulda just called him whiskey  
><em>

* * *

><p><strong>AN: I'm sorry that it's been a while! I have finals this week and last week wasn't much better with school work. Also, don't hate me for this chapter. Piper went from 0 to 180 and back in a matter of hours, but she realized she didn't want to ruin her friendship with Alex...but what will Alex have to say about it the next day?**


	8. I Swear

Chapter Eight: I Swear

_Alex's POV_

"Literally, what the fuck just happened?" Jules asks me, her hands clutching a pool stick as she leans on the billiards table. "Didn't see Piper kiss you literally thirty minutes ago? What did you do, Alex?"

I did everything. That's what I wanted to say. Except, this time, I don't think I really did anything wrong. I mean, yeah, I said some stupid shit to her in the bathroom earlier because I'm a little intoxicated and a little pissed off that Piper brought up Jules. But now Piper's fucking with my feelings again, and I can't help but want to punch a wall.

And the worst thing is that now I know she has some bottled up feelings for me, and I can't do anything to change her mind. My guess is that she doesn't want to ruin our friendship by pursuing whatever she is feeling towards me. But she's being a chicken-shit coward, and I can't deal with her playing with my life anymore. It's all or nothing for me. That's who I am and that's who I will always be.

The worst part of it all is that Piper is still here at the bar with Eric. She pins me up against the outside of the restaurant an hour ago, telling me to remember the kiss when I go back home with Jules, but here she is with pretty boy at the bar as if nothing from last night and today meant anything to her. I want to know what happened to my best friend. No way would she have done this bullshit back in high school. I guess she's changed, and maybe I need to accept that.

"She told me that the only reason she kissed me is because she wanted to see what it was like. Basically, that I'm just some experiment for her. Something she needed to flush out of her system. But I told her, Jules, I fucking told her to not fuck with me feelings and there she goes, fucking with my heart again. Fuck this," I spit out, my breathing becoming shallow out of anger. "Hand me that tequila shot. I need to be drunker to handle this fucking shit right now."

So I shut off my heart from all feelings. If Piper wants to try to tell me that our kiss meant nothing, fine. I can handle that if it was true. But all of a sudden, she pursued me and I fucking liked it because I fucking love her. Right now, though, right now I need more alcohol because that tequila shot has already disappeared into my stomach.

The best thing about being at a bar is that so many people are here, talking about their problems and their life that there is a perfect amount of noise to block out my thoughts. As I make my way up to the bar, I let the noise take over. And what I heard when I stopped thinking and started listening to the noise is something that I can never un-hear.

"I've heard about her, how she has a stick up her ass and won't date anyone. So I made a bet with my buddy at the station. He said I won't be able to get her in bed before Christmas, but I think I'm about to check mate her, if you know what I mean."

My eyes scan the room to find the person who the voice belongs to. It's not a voice I know that well, but I know it now. After a few seconds, my gaze falls upon Piper's date. He's chatting away about fucking conquering Piper like she's nothing. In this moment, I forget all of what happened between us tonight. I forget that she's played with my heart like a yoyo. In this moment, my best friend side comes out, my protective side.

Walking over to where he stands, I tap the douche on the shoulder and wait until he turns around to face me. The moment his face comes into view, I pull my arm back and release. My fist connects with his nose, and he stumbles backwards, bringing his hands to cover his nose. Blood is starting to gush out, and I don't care. He's giving me this fucking incredulous look that makes me want to punch him again—or at least kick him in his fucking tiny balls.

"What the fuck lady?" He spits out in anger. When he sees that it was me who punched him, I watch the gears rotate in his little head as he connects two and two. "You? The girl at the restaurant. You love her, don't you? Well, too fucking bad."

Piper is still nowhere to be seen, but the whole bar has started to surround us, making a haphazard circle around us like we are about to full out brawl on the bar floor. Blood is seeping through the dick's fingers, and someone hands him a washcloth. I want to rip the cloth out of his hands. He deserves nothing. He made Piper into a fucking sex bet and she has no clue. Not like she'd believe me if I told her anyway.

That only leaves me one option. The option that I hate the most: to somehow become friends with her again. She needs to trust me first before I can spill the beans that her boy toy is a fucking liar and asshole. That means I am going to have to pretend that this night never happened—that I was too drunk to remember anything. But it also means that Piper can't find out that I punched Eric or I lose all of her trust.

"Fuck you for treating her like a piece of meat. She's going to find out sooner or later, and when she does, I plan on coming back to take another punch at you," I say with a whole lot of courage. I'm not a fighter, despite my badass demeanor. He is actually the first person I have punched in my entire life.

"Like she's going to believe you," Eric states simply. He's about to say something else until he hears Piper's voice coming from the crowd. At this point, the circle has already started to fade. Once she reaches us, she looks at Eric's face and then back at me.

"What happened?" Piper says as she rushes over to Eric, leaving me standing there like an idiot. Which I am. I am an idiot. "Did you—did you punch Eric?"

And how am I supposed to lie now? There's no way she is going to believe me.

"No, she didn't, Piper. I fell and hit my nose on the ground. She came over to help me out. She your friend?"

I can honestly say I did not expect that to come from Eric's mouth. But then I realize what he is trying to do. He doesn't want Piper to be in a pissed off mood because then she won't want to fuck him tonight. That douche. And to make it worse, he's feigning innocence. God, I hate him so much right now because I know that Piper thinks he's Mr. Right.

"Um, yeah, she's my best friend," Piper says quietly, stumbling over the words a little bit, unsure if we are best friends after everything that has transpired between us. "Let's get you out of here and back to home."

Eric nods his head, pulling Piper into a hug. Once the two are in a full embrace, Eric takes that as an opportunity to wink at me, trying to convey that he's won this time.

Well, he might have won the battle, but I am going to win the war.

"Piper, can I talk to you for a minute?" I ask as the two pull apart. She looks hesitant to answer me. Everything that has happened tonight is seriously fucked up, but I know what I need to do to win her back. I couldn't see it before because I was blinded by my love for her. Finally, she nods her head and leads us outside into the cold air.

"What Alex?" Piper states, anger laced in her voice. I don't know why she's angry after all the shit she put me through tonight, but I look past it. I have to right now.

"Can we just forget it all?" I say in haste, knowing that if I don't say it now then I never will say it. "Can we be friends again?"

And there it is. We went from friends to more than friends and now back to friends again. The cycle never ends, I swear. But, this time, I plan on being a friend in order to be a lover later on. It has to work or else all of this shit that has happened since high school is all in vain.

"Ok," Piper whispers into my ear, bringing me in for a hug.

* * *

><p>The sun pokes through my curtains, waking me up a lot earlier than I would have liked. My head is pounding like someone took a hammer to it multiple times. Picking up my glasses, I shove them onto the bridge of nose as my vision comes into focus. It's a good feeling, finally being able to see. Like, really, truly see.<p>

"You fucker. You woke me up," a voice says next to me. I jump a little, not realizing that I have company in my own fucking bed. But it's Jules, and we're both fully clothed, so my heart starts to slow down a little bit.

"Why are you in my bed?"

"I don't actually know. We were both pretty drunk last night," Jules confirms to me as if I can't feel the after effects of my binge drinking. "And you punched that douche face! Oh my god, that was fucking gold, Alex."

That's when I remember all of what happened. Piper kissing me. Piper "leaving me." Eric telling some guy Piper's a sex bet to him. Me punching Eric. Piper and I becoming friends _again._ Wow, yesterday was an interesting day to say the least. I want to vanish all of thoughts from my memory, but, unfortunately, I can't so here I am. Hungover and pissed.

"He placed a bet on Piper that he could sleep with her before Christmas. That's the only reason he is pursuing her. She's a bet to him, Jules," I strain, knowing that Jules never pushed for me to tell her why I punched him. "Oh, and Piper and I are back to officially being friends. So that's fun."

Jules shakes her head in disbelief. I almost shake mine in disbelief, too, but I can't even be disappointed or surprised at how things turned out last night. At least, not surprised at the fact that Piper took back her kiss, so to speak. She took back her feelings, and I knew she would. That's why I told her not to fuck with me. But she never listens.

I start laughing at all the shit that's happened. It's comical, it really is. I keep laughing and laughing, clutching my stomach because it hurts so much from laughing. Suddenly, Jules can't keep in her laughter either, and we both end up laughing for minutes on end. Tears have started to stream down both of our faces.

"She friend-zoned you again!"

Laugh.

"I punched someone in the face!"

Laugh.

"We made her fucking jealous!"

Laugh.

"She chose him over me!"

No laugh.

That's when it hits me. Like really hits me that Piper and I are friends again. That she is pulling away from her feelings because she can't handle it. And how can I blame her? I can't. Because I would be scared, too. Hell, I _was _scared in high school. Why does she think I wait four fucking years to tell her that I loved her? I didn't want to ruin our friendship. And by declaring my love, I ruined it. No wonder she is nervous and is pulling away. Instead of tears of laughter, tears of sadness start running down my cheeks.

"Alex, it's ok," Jules says, sliding over onto my side of the bed to hold me. "She's an idiot for treating you like that. And for fucking not seeing right through that Eric kid. You'll win her back somehow. I know you can do it, and I will help you do it."

"How? I already told her I wanted us to be friends again?"

Jules pauses for a moment, a devilish grin appearing on her face.

"Let's use that to your advantage."

* * *

><p>I pick up the house phone, a reassuring Jules standing next to me, giving me the thumbs up. She mouths 'you can do it' and walks away to leave me to it. Type in the number that belongs to Piper, I take a deep breath before pressing the call button. When it finally starts ringing, I feel my heart beating hard in my chest. My nerves are getting the best of me because trying to actually be friends with Piper again is a hard thing to do.<p>

"Hello," a cheerful Piper says on the other line.

My hand is resting under my chin, keeping my head propped up. Slowly, my heart beats normally as I picture Piper in her house. She's probably lying on the couch, watching one of those reality TV shows that she made me watch with her all the time in high school.

"Piper, hey," I say, my voice breaking a little.

"What's up?"

Ok, after what happened last night, Piper seems to be in really high spirits, and I'm a little worried that she's brushing everything under the rug. Which, by the way, never works.

"I want to apologize for everything that's happened in the last few days," I start off. Piper's humming a little bit in the background, and she doesn't stop humming when I say I want to make it up to her, which has to be a good thing, right?

"What do you have in mind?" Piper asks.

I actually had no idea. Pausing briefly, I try to think of something we always did back in high school during the winter. And then it hits me.

"Want to go ice skating?"

"I thought you hated ice skating?"

That's true. I actually still hate it, but what Piper doesn't know won't hurt her. Besides, Piper loved ice skating. She would always go on and on about how it was her favorite winter activity and how I always ruined her fun time because I'd complain about my feet hurting or the cold whenever we went. This is my chance to show her that I've changed. That I can be her best friend again.

"You know what? I love it now. I go all the time back at home," I lie.

Before Piper can respond, I hear a beeping noise in the speaker of the phone like someone is dialing another phone number into the phone I'm currently using. That can only mean one thing: my mother is trying to use the other phone. I am about to yell downstairs for my mom to hang up the phone when, low and behold, my mom starts talking into the phone.

Fucking old telephones. Why didn't my mom ever swap a house phone for a cell phone? House phones allow you to hear the calls made by anyone using the other phone. Gah.

"Hello, Joyce?" My mom's voice comes blasting through the phone. I hear Piper chuckling in the background and I slap my forehead in disbelief of this whole situation.

"Mom? I'm on the phone."

"Oh, well, Alex, what are you doing over at Joyce's?" For as much as I love my mom, sometimes she is not the sharpest tool in the shed. I roll my eyes.

"No, Mom, I'm in the living room…ten feet away from you and I'm on the phone."

I want to rip the phone out of my mom's hands, but Piper is still on the phone and no doubt she'd hear me say something to my mom. So, I opt to let my mom keep talking, even though I was just about to hear Piper's response to my ice skating proposal.

"Oh, you know, well, I was wondering, while I have you on the phone, what would like from the liquor store? They have that fruity stuff you've always wanted to try."

I'm trying to hold back the anger, but I'm about to explode soon.

"Mom, please," I say through gritted teeth.

"Sorry," she says, hanging up the phone finally.

"Fruity drinks? Isn't that a little too girly for Ms. Beer over there?" Piper picks fun at me, and I mentally make a note to chastise my mother for bringing that up.

"Yeah, well, I told you, I've changed. So, ice skating?" I ask. "Are you free on Christmas Eve? I have to leave after Christmas so I wanted to spend as much time with you as possible. Like the good ole times."

_Who the fuck says that shit? _I mentally curse. _Fucking turning me into a softie like I was in high school around her. No, Alex. You are not a softie. Be a man. I mean, be a woman._

"Sure, I'm free. Pick me up at 6?"

With plans set in place, I hang up the phone. Jules makes her back into the living room, and I give her a smile. The smile is for a few reasons. One, Piper doesn't feel awkward around me anymore. Two, I have a sort-of date with her later today. And three, I'm about to win her back over.

* * *

><p>Christmas Eve on the Lake is one of the best thing my shitty, small town has to offer all year long, and I plan on making it the best night for Piper possible. I'm going to suck up to her, feigning interest in her and Eric's relationship and acting like a best friend would. After the night is over, I'm going to break the news to her about Eric and pray for the best. It's not like I want to tell her after a hopefully fun night, but I'm leaving after Christmas and there is no way I can hold it in until the next time I'm in Hillon.<p>

I hop in my car and plug my phone into the aux cord so I can play my music.

_And I swear by the moon and the stars in the skies,_

_I'll be there._

_I swear, like a shadow that's by your side. _

_I'll be there._

Arriving at Piper's house, I honk the horn to let her know that I'm here. After a few moments, she opens the door and it's all I can do not to stare at her. She has on a cute beanie-like winter hat with a tan peacoat and blue jeans. Her make-up is perfect and so is her hair. Honestly, she looks like she is stepping out of a winter catalogue for .

"Ready?" I ask once she slides in the car.

"Ready."

We take off, heading to the ice skating rink—well, ok the lake that has turned into an ice skating rink because the lake is frozen. It's a really cool little place in our town, and, on Christmas Eve, the town strings up lights, and vendors set up booths with cool little trinkets or food or hot chocolate. A live band plays, and it's just a really fun night.

"You look good," Piper tells me quietly, as if she hopes she isn't crossing some newfound friend boundary. It's been a couple days since we made the plans, and Jules told me it was best not to really contact her that much because it would make things worse for me. It would make me want her more.

But that failed because having days apart from her made me want her more.

"Thanks," I say with a smile. Sliding my hand over to rest on her leg—like I did the other day out of habit—I immediately draw it back as if her leg was fire and I burned my hand. "Um, you look beautiful, too, by the way."

I watch as Piper blushes a little, pushing a strand of her blonde hair away from her face. I want to stop the car and pull her lips to mine so badly, but I can't and it kills me. It's the hardest thing in the world to love someone you can't be with. Or at least, that doesn't see you the same way (even though I know she does. I know it).

"Uh, um, thank, thank you," she stammers out. My hand on her leg must have affected her more than I thought, and she turns her attention to outside as I continue to drive us to the lake to go ice skating.

Once we arrive, Piper's face lights up like a child. The lake is absolutely gorgeous. The lights are fucking fantastic this year, illuminating the darkness with brightness and reflecting off the shiny surface of ice. The music is perfect, quiet enough to not be obnoxious but loud enough to hear in the background. And, wow, there are a shit ton of vendors this year.

Without realizing it, Piper grabs my hand and drags me along to where the booths begin, eyeing the booths like they are buried treasure and she just struck gold. I want to hold onto her hand forever, and, so, I do. I don't let go. And neither does she. We don't say anything or acknowledge anything. We just keep looking at the booths and eating food and laughing and doing the things we did all the time in high school.

"Aren't you full already?" I say in shock as Piper orders another hot dog. Her stomach is an empty pit, I swear.

"Nope. I'm never full, Alex, you should know this!" She laughs a little, clenching my hand tighter in hers. "Anyway, you're paying for it all…so…why not?"

"Oh, that's all I am to you now? A walking ATM? That's so comforting, Pipes," I joke back, nudging her shoulder with mine. She nudges me back, and we both start laughing. In the midst of our laughter, I take a good look at her. The way her eyes crinkle and her mouth widens when she laughs. The way her hand has stayed in mine.

"Are you happy with him?" I ask out of the blue. Because I need to know. Because I don't want to break her heart when I tell her about the bet. "Really, truly happy?"

I'm assuming the two went on another date in the couple of days that had passed after the dinner and drinks disaster. Piper stops laughing, slipping her hand out of mine, and I automatically miss the warmth and comfort that comes from holding her small hand. That's when I know I fucked up the night. I knew I would do it. I planned on doing it later, though.

"He's a good guy, Al. He's perfect," she whispers as if she doesn't fully believe herself. "My mom loves him already and she hasn't met him yet."

I remain quiet for a minute and think about how she never answered the question. And how could she? She just met the guy. But, still, she should know if she is happy with him. Is that unreasonable for a best friend to ask? I guess so, considering our recent kissing history. Smooth, Alex. Real smooth.

"That's good. I just want you to be happy," I try to say convincingly. "That's what best friends are for, right?" I nudge Piper again like I did minutes ago to see if she'd nudge back. If she did, it meant we were ok. But she doesn't and now I'm worried.

"Yeah, that's what best friends are for."

We drop the subject and continue our trek around the vendors and booths before finally renting ice skates and hitting the ice. Piper has always been the best out of the both of us. And, by best, I mean that I can't even go two feet without almost falling flat on my face or eating it. It's embarrassing to the least.

"Hey, look, it's our friendship star," Piper points out as she picks me up from the ice for the millionth time in the last twenty minutes. I'm in awe that Piper even pointed it out and remembered it. I thought for sure she'd forget which one it is.

"Every night that summer, I would go outside and look up at the stars. I would sit outside in a chair on my porch and outline the star with my finger, hoping that if I looked at it long enough that you would appear and everything would go back to normal. But no matter how many times I look at the star, you never returned. Until now."

Tears well up in my eyes, and I am about to do something rash and stupid—kiss her. Even though I know I shouldn't. Even though we are friends again. Even though she is trying to keep us from ruining our friendship. Even though, even though, even though. Piper realizes the effect of what she said and skates a step ahead of me. She's embarrassed because she knows saying that made her vulnerable to me, to her feelings, and she doesn't want that.

She takes off, skating away. Of course, I'm struggling behind her on the ice and trying to catch up so that I can talk to her. Now that we are both sober and in the right mind, I need to tell her how I feel again despite telling and showing her many times before today. Screw the plan. Screw it all. I want Piper and that's it. I've always been the one to get what I want (ok, after the whole high school fiasco with Piper) and now I'm going to get her. I'm going to tell her about Eric and I'm going to make her see her true feelings.

"Piper, wait! Come on, you know I can't skate fast….or at all," I say. Piper halts in her tracks, her back facing me. I see her hands come up to her eyes, wiping away what I believe are tears. Damn it, she's crying again.

"I don't want to ruin us," she tells me barely above a whisper. "I can't deal with losing you again."

That's the closest she has come to admitting her feelings to me since, well, ever. And I know that's why she's holding back. Even if she does like asshole Eric, she still loves me more. She can feel it now. Something triggered inside of her when I arrived here in Hillon again after ten years, and it's killing her. I know this because, even after ten years apart, I know Piper.

"You won't lose me?"

"You're leaving, Alex! You're going back to your new life and your job and your fancy cars in two days. I'm already losing you, and I can't do it to myself. I kissed you, and I liked it, but I'm sorry. It's not worth losing our friendship. I'd rather be friends than nothing. I've missed you so much," Piper explains in a way that breaks my heart into two.

I'm at a loss for words because she's right. We have no chance. Right?

"Oh," I say.

"I'm so sorry. I fucked with your feelings, and I want to take it back."

I skate a little bit farther away from her—or attempt to skate farther away. I almost fall in the process of it, but I recover. Piper is staring at me with those Bambi eyes of her, a sad look on her face as she standing in the middle of a frozen lake.

"But you can't, Piper. You can't take it back. And that sucks," I tell her. "It sucks a lot because, you know what, I fucking love you so much that it hurts. It hurts like a bitch seeing you with Eric. It hurts knowing that you love me too but won't admit it."

"I'm sorry…"

And she looks sorry. She looks so sorry, and it takes all my resolve not to break down.

I skate over to her, planning on hugging her because that's what friends do. Hug. But when I get over there, I realize I only have another day of seeing her for a long time so I go for it. I don't hold back. I'm sick of waiting for Piper.

Pressing my lips to hers, I draw her closer to me. At first, Piper seems hesitant, as if this is the worst thing in the world to do in public, but, after a second or two, she melts into me. A moan escapes her lips, and I pull her tighter to me. Her hands find my hips and squeeze. My hands wrap around her shoulders, my lips glued onto hers.

Then I pull away.

"Don't tell me you don't love me, too?"

"Alex…" she's obviously shaken up from the kiss. "I…"

"Eric's only with you because he bet someone he could get you in bed by Christmas. Merry Christmas, kid," I say, looking at my watch as it hits 12 am. Fireworks shoot in the air, and the crowd starts oohing and awing as I skate away, leaving Piper touching her lips and wondering what the fuck I just said.

* * *

><p><strong>AN: By far, the longest chapter I've ever written in my life. I thought I owed you guys for the shortness of last chapter. And because I didn't update in a while before last chapter. Anyway, hope you like it. Things are getting complicated for the two...and Alex leaves the day after Christmas. Hmmmm. **


	9. Make You Miss Me

Chapter Nine: Make You Miss Me

_Piper's POV_

It's the funniest thing in the world, thinking you know someone but realizing that you don't know them at all. As Alex skates away, fireworks popping behind her, I see clearly now that I don't know Alex anymore. Alex and I aren't the same Alex and I as we were in high school. She isn't the girl I knew and I'm not the girl she knew. But where do we go from here? She's leaving me in two days—I won't see her again for who knows how long.

"Are you ok?" A little boys asks me. His cheeks and nose are tipped red from the cold, and he is staring at me with these sad eyes. "You look lonely."

My heart melts at the words he says because little kids are so perceptive sometimes. It's as if as we get older, the world shapes and hardens us to these people who can't look beyond our problems and life. But, through all this shit I've gone through the last few days, I haven't allowed myself to actually think about what I want and what I need.

So am I ok? I don't know. My best friend comes back to town after ten years apart, and she stills loves me and I think I might now love her? But I find this perfect guy who maybe isn't all the perfect anymore. Who do I trust? What do I do?

"I'm ok," I tell the little boy. He gives me this sad smile, a smile that tells me he knows I'm lying. "Actually, I'm not. My best friend loves me but I can't admit I love her, too. So I lost her."

The boy, who is surprisingly a very apt ice skater, slides forward to come right up to me. He has a tear in his eye, and, without saying another word, he gives me a huge hug. His little arms can't fully wrap around me, and he barely comes up to my hips, which makes it even cuter. Then he says something that makes me realize what I want and what I need.

"If she loves you and you love her, why does the rest matter?"

He says nothing else, just skates away and leaves me there wondering how I fucked up everything.

* * *

><p>Hesitantly, I pick up my phone and text the one person I don't want to talk to right now. My fingers are shaking but I send the message and patiently wait for the response. It feels like hours before my phone buzzes three times, signaling the arrival of a text message. I ignore my phone for a second, not wanting to actually face the response and prospect of what I'll have to do afterwards.<p>

It's officially Christmas, and I've made my home from the ice skating rink (lake) and am currently nursing my third cocktail at the bar. It doesn't surprise me that my workplace is open at 1:30 am on Christmas morning. People in my town love their alcohol, that's for damn sure, as I'm proving right now.

**From: Eric**

**I'll be there in 15 ;) **

After Alex told me that Eric placed a sex bet on me, I had to make sure it was actually true. Because how can I trust Alex didn't say that out of anger and jealousy? Eric never gave me a reason to believe he was only trying to get into my pants, so I don't know what's true. That's why I asked him to come to the bar—because I need to know.

Putting my phone down, I pass the time by flipping through the songs on the jukebox and taking sips of my really strong cocktail. Before I know it, I'm dancing by myself, a little buzzed and a whole lot confused. I'm shaking my butt and swaying my hips when all of a sudden I feel someone place their hands right above my hips. It's Eric. I swallow down the nerves and turn around to face him.

"Hey babe," he says, giving me a chaste kiss on my cheek. "Are you drunk?"

My face must be red—the tall-tell sign that I'm not sober. Eric only chuckles, but the look in his eyes is unmistakable. It's the look I've seen in so many people that frequent the dingy bar. It's the look that makes me think Alex might be telling the truth, not that she's ever really lied to me ever (not telling me she loved me in high school isn't a lie—she just never verbalized the truth). Voluntarily, I take a slight step back, trying to create a little distance between Eric and me.

"Did you place a bet on me?" I ask bravely, staring at Eric's lust-filled eyes. "Don't lie, ok?"

Before I realize it, Eric takes my hand and drags me to a quieter section of the bar. We sit down in a booth, facing each other with looks of confusion and anger on both of our faces. My mind goes into overdrive. What if Eric didn't place a bet on me? Then I'd ruin what we have and on Christmas no less. I'm trying to stop thinking but I can't.

"Where did you get that absurd idea, Piper? A bet? Who do you think I am?" Eric questions me. But, for some reason, the way he says it makes me know for certain that he's lying. I just know. I can't explain how I do, but it's like when I realized that I loved Alex, too. It just hit me.

This whole time I've been trying to find Mr. Right, but what I failed to see is how I already found Mrs. Right. I am just too much of a coward to act on it for foolish reasons, idiotic excuses. All of a sudden, I stand up, wanting to leave the bar and go find Alex. But it's late and Alex is most likely asleep.

God, what a fucking day it's been.

"Let me guess, it was the lesbian who planted this stupid thought in your mind?" Eric says with a bit of disgust behind his voice. This is an Eric I've never seen previously, and I'm scared for a second.

"Don't you dare talk about my best friend like that, Eric," I pause. "Why did you try to take me home the other night after our movie date?"

It was a day after the failed dinner and drinks date, and Eric kept asking me what I was doing after the movie ended. I told him I was tired and wanted to go to sleep, but he pressed on, asking if he could come over. I said no, chalking up his attitude to nerves.

"Because, you little prude, I wanted to get into your pants. No one resists Eric," he says, trailing his arms down his body in a gesture that now makes me want to vomit with disgust. "But, no. Apparently, the guys at the station were right."

I don't allow him to talk anymore. Tears start to form in the corner of my eyes, and I furiously wipe them away, simultaneously wiling them to go the fuck away. I don't want to cry over him, he isn't worth it. All the guys I've dated do this shit to me—turn out to be giant assholes.

The first thing I do when I burst outside—the cold air hitting me like a ton of bricks—is call a cab. The second thing I do is force myself not to call or text Alex. I can only imagine what she thinks of me now because I'm the best friend who led her on, only thinking of myself and my needs, not hers. But now, now I want her so much. It's like I've finally seen the light and I can't get enough of it. I want it to consume my whole being. I want it to fill my every sense, be my very essence. And that makes it so much harder to not call Alex.

I guess I'll just have to wait until Christmas evening today to tell her everything. To tell her I'm sorry.

To tell her that I love her, too.

But first, I need to sober up and get some sleep. And I need to go through my closet to find the scrapbook I never got to give Alex after we graduated high school.

For once, I'm not nervous or scared or worried or cowardice. For once, I'm anxious. I'm ready.

* * *

><p>"Mom? Do you know where the scrapbook I made Alex is? The one I made for her grad gift?"<p>

I'm frantic at this point. It's almost five in the evening, and I have a feeling in the pit of my stomach that is telling me something is off, something is wrong. I don't know what exactly is wrong but it has to deal with Alex. So I need to go over to her house. I need to see her and put my heart on the line. But I can't find the damn scrapbook.

"That old thing? I think it's in the basement, hon. Why ever do you want it?" My mom says in her snooty voice.

I don't respond. Instead, I bolt downstairs and start looking through some old boxes of mine. It only takes a second for me to find it, and, when I do, a smile breaks out on my face, despite that gut feeling that _something _is still wrong. I know I need to go to Alex's, but I have an urge to look through the old book.

Flipping open the first page, my heart tumbles around in my chest—a happy tumble, a nostalgic tumble. It's the first picture we ever took together. Something funny was said before Alex's mom snapped the photo, causing my mouth to be open with laughter and my eyes crinkled. Alex, on the other hand, had turned to look at me—probably to chastise me on how her mom "isn't funny, Pipes." A soft smile adorned her face as she stared right at me in mid-laugh. Her arm is around my waist and mine around her shoulder. It's perfect.

The rest of the book has a bunch of photos from sleepovers and homecoming dances (even though Alex was "too cool for lame ass high school dances"). The last picture is the one we took on graduation day. Diplomas in our hands, graduation robes and caps on our bodies and heads. Alex again has her head turned towards me, placing a light kiss on my cheek while my one arm is outstretched, reaching high into the air with my diploma in hand.

I feel a singular tear roll down my face once I close the book. Looking at all of that made me really miss being with Alex. We always had the best of times, loving being in each other's presence. And then, with the blink of an eye, she was gone from my life. Until a few days ago when God blessed me with her presence one more time—blessed me with an opportunity to right a wrong.

Pushing myself off the ground of my basement, I head upstairs and grab my car keys. My voice carries through the house, echoing my goodbye to my family. With that, I take off towards Alex's house, towards my beginning—towards Alex.

Once I reach my destination, I all but sprint to the front door. I haven't really planned out what I am going to say to Alex, but it doesn't matter. Alex is the one that has a way with words, not me. She'll just laugh at me, giving me that eyebrow raise and smirk she is known for. Raising my hand, I knock on the door three times. My heart is pounding in my chest, and butterflies are flying around my stomach in anticipation.

The door opens to reveal Diane Vause, Alex's mom. She smiles once she sees me. Since I've been back in Hillon, I always avoided Diane at all costs, not wanting to see her for fear of bringing back memories of my best friend.

"Piper, what a great surprise!" She steps forward to give me a hug. "Merry Christmas! Why are ya stopping by?"

I strain to hear Alex's voice in the background, but I hear nothing but a fire roaring in a fireplace. Something is wrong. Something is not right.

"Uh, well, I came by to see Alex."

Diane's smile slowly dissipates from her face. For some reason, I think she knows that I came to tell Alex that I love her more than anything in the world. But that leaves me confused as to why she stopped smiling when I asked to see Alex.

"Oh, honey, she left this morning to go back to work."

_Whoa whoa_

_I ain't gonna be that easy to leave_

_Whoa whoa_

_Girl, I'm gonna make you miss me_

_Make you wish that you were sleeping in my shirt_

_Lie about my jacket and tell everyone it's yours_

_When your phone rings after midnight and you're thinking maybe it's me_

_I'm gonna make you miss me_

* * *

><p><strong>AN: The song inspiration for this chapter is by Sam Hunt. It's called (like the title) Make You Miss Me, and I think it fits this chapter and the story really well! Take a listen to it (it's country but more like pop-country. It really sounds nothing like the country you're probably thinking of). Sorry it's a little shorter of a chapter, but now that finals are over, I should have more time to write. Also, the story will go past Christmas :) **


	10. Make Me Wanna

Chapter Ten: Make Me Wanna

_Piper's POV_

The door is shut gently in my face, as if the quiet click of the lock will lessen the pain. But it won't and it doesn't. Once the door is completely closed, I slump down and start to cry because I realize how much I fucked up and how much I'm in love with this girl. And now I know the reasons why I love her far exceed the reasons why I didn't want to be with her. Alex is charming, comforting, kind-hearted and warm—she's perfect in all the imperfectly perfect ways. My life once Alex left wasn't a life. I thought it was when I was running around Smith, getting drunk and high every weekend. I thought it was when I moved back home and reconnected with an ex. And I thought it was once I picked myself up off the ground and got a job. But it wasn't a life—it was a shell of life.

Diane told me before she gently shut the door that Alex would be at Red's Records headquarters in LA. She told me to go, to fight for Alex. I never even told her a word about my feelings for her daughter. Diane just knew. And that's what gives me the courage to drive to the nearest airport and buy the next ticket out to LA. It's what drives my every action, knowing someone out there believes in us and knows how deep my love for Alex ran before I even knew. In high school, I never thought of Alex that way, despite the butterflies I got when around her or the ache in my heart when she wasn't with me. And it took me until now to accept what I feel, and I don't regret accepting it. I regret not showing it and not acting on it until

it was too little.

"Boarding Flight 202 for Los Angeles, California," the lady for American Airlines says over the loud speaker. I grab my tiny backpack that stores only two items: the scrapbook and my wallet. I have nothing else. I need nothing else—besides Alex Vause. That I need right now. I need her lips on mine, her hand in my hand and her heart with mine. I crave it so much that I can't understand how I lived this long without it. But I'm glad I found it: love, that is.

Sliding into the seat next to the window, I draw out my phone and earbuds, pushing the buds in my ear and pressing play on my iPhone music library. The flight takes off as the music continues to thump and pound, and I find myself staring out the plane window, the snow-covered fields and hills zooming by on the ground below. Before I know it, though, the snow slowly disappears, replaced by red and brown dirt plains. Dirt turns into prickly grass and sunshine, and the captain comes on to say that we have arrived in California, approaching our final destination soon.

The plane lands smoothly, and I grab my backpack from the overhead compartment before exiting the airplane and entering the airport. I keep walking and walking until I make it outside, the sun dazzling in the sky. It's a nice change of pace from the cold and snow, that's for sure. Anyway, I hail a cab and tell the driver my destination. He nods his head before speeding away towards the place where I will bear my soul. And where I hope Alex will take me back.

"Here we are Miss," the cabby says, outstretching his hand for payment.

"Thanks," I reply, slipping a twenty into his hand before shutting the yellow door and looking up at the massive skyscraper in front of me.

Taking small but sure steps, I push open the glass door and strut up to the receptionist's desk. The lady has a head full of hair, a grin tattooed on her face. She looks bored yet constantly amused. It confuses me slightly, but I ignore it as I continue my trek towards her.

"Hello, I would like to know what floor Alex Vause is on," I say confidently, hoping she'll give me the information I want without me having to pry it out of her. But I'm thinking I'll have to do the latter instead of the former.

"You and everyone else today, blondie," the receptionist, whose nameplate reads Nicole Nichols, shoots back at me. "What's your name? I'll see if she has ya scheduled in or something."

"Oh, I won't be scheduled in there. I'm a close friend of hers. Piper Chapman." Maybe the name will ring a bell. And, to my luck, I watch as the girl's face lights up in delight as if she has been waiting for this moment her whole life.

"Well, Piper, she isn't in the office right now. She's at home," the lady explains. "But, I can give you her address."

I'm thinking about how easy that was as the receptionist scribbles down an address on a piece of paper and slides it over the cool surface of the glass top. Giving me a wink, she says one last thing before I leave.

"Good luck, Piper. Good damn luck."

* * *

><p>I had no idea that Alex had a home here in LA, but I guess I shouldn't be surprised with the amount of money she makes now. She probably also spends a lot of time in this city, too. What I am really surprised by is the actual house itself. It's a huge, two story house that overlooks a valley below. I spot an infinity pool in the backyard, and I immediately want to jump in it. The rest of the outside of the house is painted in white, a five-door garage adjacent to the house. It's gorgeous—the design and feel of the place. Very modern and sleek.<p>

I knock on the door three times, the scrapbook wrapped underneath my non-knocking arm. My legs are spazzing out, my feet tapping the ground anxiously. Time seems to slow down, but, even through the appeared slowness, the amount of time I stand at the door seems absurdly long. I know she's home, so I turn the handle—it's unlocked—and push my way into the house.

The lights are on and I make my way towards the center of the house. I don't see or hear anything on the main floor so I opt to go the second floor where I presume Alex's room is located. As my feet plop up each step, I hear muffled noises and know Alex is up here. I keep following the noise to a simple black door. I want to push it open, but I know doing that will give Alex a heart attack. But I have no other option.

I turn the handle slowly and open the door. But what I find on the other side is not what I expected. Nothing about today is what I expected. But I guess I should've expected this. I should've saw this coming. On the other side of the door is Alex and Jules, laying in bed and laughing their heads off at something on the TV plastered opposite of Alex's king-sized bed.

"Mother fucker!" Alex screams at first, thinking I am an intruder, which I suppose I am. After she sees it's me, a confused look flits across her beautiful face. "Piper?"

But I don't respond because I keep looking at Jules. I mean, I couldn't expect Alex to wait for me forever, right? I denied her. Why would she not move on? So, I drop the scrapbook on the ground and sprint away. I run away like Alex did to me ten years ago. And now I know why she ran. It's easier than facing the consequences. It's easier to never look back.

* * *

><p><em>Alex's POV<em>

"Am I seeing things, Jules? Please tell me I did not just seeing fucking Piper appear in my room?" My body is trembling at the sight I think I saw. Honestly, with how I've been feeling today, it wouldn't surprise me that I hallucinated that. Also, I'm drunk so it really could've been my imagination.

"Shit, Alex, I wish it was an hallucination. But Piper is actually here, and she just ran away, so what are you waiting for? Go get you girl."

I stumble out of my bed, tripping on the object Piper dropped. Taking a moment, I pick it up and see what it is. And when my mind registers what I'm holding, I know I need to find Piper. She came here for a reason, and I think I know what that reason is. But she saw me with Jules and probably thought the worst, so she ran away, something we both do in the friendship (relationship).

"Piper!" I scream out as I trapeze down the stairs and head outside. The door is wide open, and I sprint right through it. Piper is standing on the curb, a cab coming closer and closer to my house. The damn cab will get to Piper before I can, and I curse out loud. My fucking luck. Really.

"Don't get in that cab. Don't run away," I yell. I feel myself succumbing to the tears and the sadness, and I drop to the ground. "Piper. Don't."

And, in that moment, time stops. I see my life ahead of me, one without Piper in it and one with her. The thought of one without her cripples me. But then time resumes, and I notice Piper's hand open the cab door. It's over. It's really over. We both fucked it up, and there's no way to salvage it. Whatever it is.

I wait for Piper to slide into the cab, but she never does. She mumbles something to the cabby before stepping back and shutting the door. The cab drives away, leaving Piper in its wake and on my curb. My head lifts up, and I watch as Piper gives me a timid smile. I stand up and will myself to walk over to her. Piper starts waking towards me, too, before breaking out into a run, halting when she's a mere foot away.

"Piper, I can…" I start to say before I am cut off by Piper's lips on mine.

It's not a tender kiss by any means. Piper swallows all the words I was going to say. All the emotion pent up between us is released as our mouths move together as one. I grip into Piper's waist with all my might, thinking that if I let go, she will leave me. Piper throws her arms around my shoulders, her hands tangling in my hair. She bites my bottom lip, and I groan at the feeling. As I groan, Piper uses that as the opportunity to slip her tongue into my mouth. We continue like this—mouths moving and tongues dancing—until we both need air. Pulling away, Piper takes her hand and cups my cheek as I rest my forehead against hers.

"Pipes, what are you doing?"

She looks me square in the eyes, our foreheads still pressed against each other's and our breaths both ragged.

"Alex, from the moment you left ten years ago, a gap formed in my heart. A gap I didn't even know I still needed filled before you showed up last week. I had moved on with my life, and I thought I was happy. But, fuck, Al, I wasn't happy at all. And it took me until I saw you again to understand that the only way to fill the gap in my heart was to be with the person who created it in the first place," Piper explains, putting her hand up to signal for me to not interrupt.

"And I'm not blaming you for causing this gap because the reason I had the gap is because when you left, my heart realized it belonged with you. I didn't fight hard enough to win you back or to verbalize my feelings for you. Hell, I denied the feelings for so long, and I can't do it any longer. Alex Vause, you are love that I can't live without. God, I love you so much it's insane. And I tried to make us stay friends because I didn't want to risk losing you, but, by denying my love for you, I did lose you. We can never just be friends, Alex. In high school, maybe. But now? After all of the shit that's happened, there's no way. So I don't want to be friends, ok?"

My mind tries to process all that she said, but all I can think about is how she came out to California to tell me she can't be friends with me, that she can't be around me.

"So we aren't friends? Why did you come all this way to tell me you love me but still want to shut me out of your life."

Piper gives me this sad look.

"Alex, I don't want us to be friends…"

"I get that Pipes, thanks."

"No, Alex, you don't get it. I want to be the one who you wake up to every morning. I want to be the one that holds your hand when you're scared. I want to be the one whose shoulder you cry on. I want to be the person who you fall asleep next to every damn night for the rest of your life. And I want to be the one to love you. With all of my heart and all of being."

Instead of responding back with words, I push my lips gently on hers, conveying my answer. But I say it out loud just in case.

"Ok," I whisper.

Piper smiles, kissing me again so hard that I fall backwards, taking Piper down with me. She's on top of me, giggling. And I've missed that laugh. Oh so much.

"Ok," Piper replies, kissing my cheek.

Another person's voice interrupts me as I am about to kiss Piper some more. It's Jules. She's standing on the front porch, clapping her hands loudly.

"ABOUT DAMN TIME," she screams, a smile on her face.

Piper and I both laugh out loud before I suck the laugh out of her with my lips on hers. We continue making out on my front lawn as Jules stands there clapping and hooting and hollering.

"I love you, too. So much," I state. "So damn much.

_Now baby don't you look at me that way_

_'Cause you know there's only so much I can take_

_'Cause you make me wanna_

_Pull this truck to the side of the road_

_Slide on over, let me hold you close and tell y__ou everything I'm thinking_

_Hop on out and let the tailgate fall_

_Get drunk on you with no alcohol_

_If you don't stop I'm gonna_

_Girl you make me wanna_


	11. Afterword

(Sorry this isn't a chapter)

Hello all my lovely readers,

Thanks for all the awesome reviews and pleas for the story not to end here! However, when I originally began this story, I only had a plot in mind about their journey from friends to lovers, and, at this time, I have no idea where I want or would take the story. I really love writing this fic, but, as of now, I'm going to mark it as complete until I am sure I have inspiration left to write more of this story. I didn't want to leave you all hanging, hoping for another chapter or for the story to continue. I think I am going to start another AU fic about the two (I only really like to write AU's and not canon stories), and maybe that will get my creativity flowing so that I can write more of "Just Friends."

Thanks for sticking with me on this story, and I can't believe all of the feedback I've received because of the story. It blows my mind, really. Stay tuned for another story! I can't promise when it will be posted, but knowing me, it will probably be soon because I love to write.

- IWillNeverLetYouDown (ironic username for this post...anyway...)


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